Chakravyooh....

2011-10-17T05:24:00.000-07:00

Chills !

This art
This ideation
This control..
I see you,
Who you are !
This finesse ,
This design,
From empty spaces
your creations fine !
This science, your mind,
This cosmos,
This intelligence thine !
I see you,
Who you are !
I lie kneeling here..
unresisting and supine !

This meaning,
This mind,
I see you ,
What you do !
What you create,
in your liberty,ideas you ideate !
Your mind's best.,
your voice's jest,
And it chills me !
What you can do
And what you can be !
and I conciliate..I surrender..
as my chaos falls in line !

You shape..You state
You formulate.
The ministries follow
the dotted lines you create !
A sonata ,
An orchestra of thoughts,
your work you align !
I see you, I read you , inside you..
This deprivation that you sedate !
And I fear and I supplicate,
for a merciless escape..
from the implacability of my fate!

2011-06-08T01:45:00.000-07:00

Untamed and Magnificent !

India holds over half the world's tiger population. According to the latest tiger census report released on March 28, 2011 by the National Tiger Conservation Authority, the current tiger population estimated is 1,706 (i.e. ranging between a minimum of 1,571 to a maximum of 1,875). The results include figures from 17 Indian states with a tiger population.

SAVE THE TIGER ! SPREAD THE AWARENESS !

2011-03-03T01:50:00.000-08:00

MY WET EYED MASTER

The wet eyes

on verge of sourness

that silence , that moment, hour less

that snap, so tight a slap

she felt her heart cry

when I took away my hand from hers

in my silence and ours..

I let sensitivities fry

I'm sorry

I pray

I wont keep ur eyes dry

I'l keep em wet

with tears of laughter ..n

puppeteer me my master

for I'm u'r slave... so go ahead and enjoy

2011-02-20T12:33:00.000-08:00

My Things and Yours !

Its a need
deep in m mind
a constant feed
that you are not too far behind
and I know..

I step my way,
What i feel ,
I may not say
You your way
But u 'l know i m not
gonna be this way..another day!

yet
we need to see what we want
support
sometimes
I,in my aisle
You,in Yours

I go find 'my' stuff
You get 'urs'
We meet
We hold hands
and we decide
what are 'ours'
from all those in our hands !

.. CP

2010-06-17T10:40:00.000-07:00

Breathing you !

yeah
so there are lies
there are missunderstandings
simple things i shall not miss ..
when breakfast burns i shall kiss
your hands , for you tried
..your best to feed me, yet it over fried
my absentia doesn't drive you nuts

but a certain calmness
needs to n will go on
coz i..
i'd come back to you ,
in your guts
u'd feel relieved
coz i live
and i exist
and that acknowledgement
is enough in its wonderment
knowing you
is in a sense
breathing you
and breathing with you..

CP

2010-06-09T01:50:00.000-07:00

Just let me be !

Doubled mind ..troubled behind
with split times ..n split vices
my time and tide ..in a rewind.
envenomed gifts.. asphyxiated vows
high in the tower of an ignorant tree
I see, what it looks like..to be me !

Angered breath,miffed eyes
cautious tread and stifled cries
fearing 'duncity'..my numbness grows
viced words n..gnarled brows
Wrapped in my fortress of frivolity
I see, what a cheek .. I can be !

cant let go , not right now ,
cant you see...no room to grow
stepping out .. now i know ,
this cocooned me ,in my glee
I see,What it feels like.. to be me !

in my safety,preserve me,
in my amber warmth,fossilize me
with my erudition,crucify me
and till they dig me up, remnants and all..
just let me be !

2010-05-29T12:41:00.000-07:00

Coz Your twinkle is a steal !

why undo why break
when nothing is tethered
how does one free pain... See more
when its as personal as can be
for it gives the meaning true
to joy and thoughful gain

Why climb a cliff
when one can take u high
why reach for the sun
for you are shining brighter,,
than the big one in the sky

Follies are must
for there has to be a line
between piety and lust
how else would one learn
through burnt fingers..
of wht drives another
whether it be intelligence
or just a stagnant churn

everybody loves freedom
what they dont reveal
is a desire to be bound

But when tressia talks
and when a seagull flies
jonathan agrees

that when a war's on
there is no time for wounds to heal
one grits the teeth ..drops the steel
and lives life.. for a pixie's twinkle is a steal !

2010-03-14T11:33:00.000-07:00

Need for Ashnah !

Little Girl ..
Little Joy ..
Smitten girl ..
Smitten boy..

Tall as the tree ,
Chinky eyes..
Taller than the tree,
Smiling wise..

Take me high
Bring me a change
Gift me a life..
Be Strong..

See her.. joyous highs
See Ashnah, sparkling eyes
Let her be the strength
In our separate lives

Cheers... Chakrapani

2010-01-12T23:28:00.000-08:00

POSSESSION

An angel Questioned..
little eyes twinkling,Chinky eyed...
"Have I possessed you yet ?"
She smiled...,I gazed away
No , I lied,
"A lot more ..you would need to try."
I Hid my face and my eye !

"Huh !" she moaned.
In her dejected sweetness ,
Tethering her frown,
she dropped her brow.
Lifting her moist eyes ,
she subdued her surmise.

"And have you possessed me ?"
She asked I.Scyllian tresses flying..
"I'm not there yet "
gazing away, says I..
Snapping knuckles and a fake fret.
"How long would you take to get.. ?"
"I don't know..I've sort of resigned...
sulking
in a past's dragnet !"

Little did she realize..
My stupid pride and and fake lies..
She already had me,
And i wasn't even close yet !
In the palm of her hand
in the depth of her mind.
I plunged into this headlong..
this entrapment of an emotional grind !

Im still here,
Too late..she's gone.
Gone with her are her bye's
I hear one republic..
"Its too late to apologize"

.. chakrapani

2009-12-22T04:22:00.000-08:00

This unfamiliar .. This never before

This unfamiliar .. this never before,
this shaking of the hand..
This shiver of coldness.. and its encore,
this loss of thought,the loss of cognition
This emptiness within wherever i stand.

That something.., i for so long.. so fabled,
That strength, that pride, weakened and i humbled
That scary spineless shudders I shuddered,
That life not so mine , and hers too i embittered.

..chakrapani

2009-10-21T23:04:00.000-07:00

Rocks and Reflections !

Stay with me
Stand by me..
Comfort me..
smother me..
Be my support..
Be my rock..

criticize me ..
correct me..
show me to me
Reflect me.. mirror me
Be my Reflection..

Chakrapani

2009-03-11T20:26:00.000-07:00

We..,Mere Spectators..

Things across India are not at all like that in Slumdog.., We are prosperous ..Yet not everyone here is a millionaire.. So is the case in the rest of the world !
And a rupee makes a difference to this lady .

Question ... should one give alms at the traffic signal and encourage it ?
Encourage the organized market of begging business which never comes to the fore.These beggars are never begging for themselves. There is a syndicate of kingpins and rich thugs who ferry around and deploy beggars at designated traffic points and temples ,collecting days earnings the beggars get a commission/food in return.

Fact .... NGO's and social reconstruction communities try in vain to protect the young kids who get sucked into this maelstrom of organized begging. If some people do wish to mend their life, they face the wrath of such kingpins who function under the aegis of powerful politicos.

Question... So what do we do ? How does one show direction to the little kids begging at street corners ?

Question ...How do we teach them vocational trade and craft ? Help them become self reliant and self employed so that they could earn money , to sustain themselves. How do we stop the nurturing of potential criminals and their petty thievery .

Question ... How does one fight such an organized enterprise protected by the selfish ?
Fact... Like everyone, I have questions and no answers.I am an average individual.Maybe I have a little enterprise , some ideas, yet I have no energy left with me in these times of economic duress(Sic !).

Fact ..I am in the end , a mere pathetic excuse of a spectator !

2009-03-06T22:16:00.000-08:00

BAILOUT

He's down in a ditch
the mind's in a mindless slump..
his creations running high..
Give him a muse..
so slay the lethargical dump..
for he lies.. staring at the sky
waiting for a bailout to walk by .

..chakrapani

2009-01-31T02:30:00.000-08:00

CHALK POWDER AND CHORUS !

A year ago, I had asked myself I had torn an A4 size full scape paper and opened a pen to start jotting all the stuff that held me back.What was it that was stopping me.What were the obstacles that i had to overcome.Two hours went by and not as much as a word on the sheet, I cursed myself . Not because the ball point pen nib had gone dry, but because I had no idea what had stopped me from doing this thing all these years.This thing ,that I now realize gives me such joy that knows no comparison.Sitting on a wooden bench in the headmaster's room, there I was... retrospecting.
An hour later , the bell rang and I got up, picked up two full length chalk pieces and on the way to my class broke them into one inch lengths. Some kids saw me walking up the stairs and scurried into the class shouting "Arey ! Spoken English .. spoken English class.. saar vostunnaru (Hey dudes !Spoken English Sir is coming !) ". Couple of kids approached me saluting "Good morning Saar !" (Yes ! an actual Salute !) and ran into the class. Stepping in I was greeted with a loud and boisterous greeting as 45 girls and boys stood up smiling and beaming.Most of them stretching and some almost falling onto the floor because of cramps from sitting on the floor for hours together.I gave a huge smile ,greeted them back and mumbled to myself, "Time to get my hands dirty ".
An hour later I walked out . My hands dry felt dry and rough smeared with chalk powder.I reach into my pockets for the hand kerchief .I find no use for my hanky as all the chalk has already decorated my black jeans.I don't mind. I'm happy.I wish to clap my hands to dust off whatever calcium that's left on my hands.My mind objects and I let it be.
The kids gather around me excited throwing questions at me about the singing/English speech competitions that I have announced for the next class.Me and other volunteers have planned on contributing cash for the gifts for the winners and the participants.The kids are no longer reluctant and scared to approach me.Yet there is still a lot to be done to make them confident in front of their classmates, forget the outside world.No decent footwear, some without any.No proper uniforms and clothes, torn books and bags,dirty and disheveled hair,yet gleaming faces and beaming smiles is all that I can remember.
We have to get the kids to get interested in education and make them confident that it will do them good.Most kids , boys especially, work part time and are the sole earners of the family.Their parents and siblings depend on them for the daily work and labor that they do,in that these boys are no longer afraid of their parents.
Some kids are good and eager . Encourage them.Some are reluctant and uninterested, What do we do about them ?.
Me and my friend drive back from the school.I have important work to be finished in the rest of the day. I cannot take a class for the other government primary school that I had been visiting. The 8th standard girls are wonderful there.They exude a lot of energy. They are more curious and quick learners than this class.They giggle, laugh , listen, write down stuff and interact more.
I am sorry I cannot visit you today.
It was 3 hours a week till some time back.And now an hour a week is just not enough !

Chakrapani

2008-11-12T07:16:00.000-08:00

Of Moon and A Paid Holiday !

I first visited the moon in the hot summer nights of my college days. Sleeping under the open night sky seemed to be one of the most wonderful things to do.Especially if it was the full moon night. Not that I had anything else to do,least of all.. study. And with everything in the vicinity lit up in a surreal endothermic glow, a brilliant moment,yet not blinding.Let me take you there.. that surreal place, that I love to holiday at.
The last time I visited this fabulous place for a vacation, last month, I took this picture to remind me of the fondness of the joy that I had come to associate with this place. The wide craters and grey valleys stretching till the horizon.As far as the eyes could see. Ultra quick tanning under the UV laden sunlight. Long rides over the dusty moon plains and the moon dunes with the moon buggie (The four wheeled rover provided free of charge by the hotel management free of the charge.I Know !!! great ! Isn't it, Free !, I mean who does that on earth these days ). Relaxed sailing with the friends ( or your partner for that matter) in the tranquil grey black dust of the 'Sea of tranquility'. Trekking expeditions to the top of the largest craters in the district. Exhilarating stuff !.
The locals are very hospitable and cheery people.Mostly geology scientists,who have taken to hotel and tourism industry to fund their own research and experiments.Strangely, they all seem to have a back ailment . It's probably a genetic disorder which has developed and embedded itself into their chromosomes .Something to do with the fact that their ancestors always did moon-dust research on all their fours( knees and hands) .One of the best things I liked was that the locals would welcome you to join them in a game of soccer. Their soccer fields are our seven soccer fields put together. And the best part is... You never get tired. Though we had trouble with the balls( Hmmph ! Not those ones ! Ugh !). If kicked too hard the footballs would end up orbiting the moon.And the food.. Amazzing ! The desserts.. 'Ebony and ivory', chocolate crater cake.. Black forest with moon sauce.. Ah! such a great treat.
The beaches are fabulous.With the dust waves lapping at your feet. Relaxing under the scorching sun is a burning time pass. The nights are really cold. Every morning one has to get oneself defrosted !. And that is what adds to the uniqueness of the place. I mean where else do you get to see a sky full of brilliant white stars and an enormous, brilliant blue white 'earth'. Frosty and romantic !!
All said and done, This has been one of the best places I have ever visited and no doubt, is one of my favourites.
Cheers !
Chakrapani

2008-10-23T20:31:00.000-07:00

Photographing the Moon !

You will be interested in reading this post if you are a photography enthusiast, and own a camera. Any camera for that matter, it does not have to be a high end Digital SLR camera .And what the heck is that? some of you may ask.Well, that is the type of camera which professional photographers or serious enthusiasts keep lugging around.A friend of mine happens to calls them "Space shuttle of a camera", whenever he sees one in my hand.

You can try this even with a Point-n-Shoot (regular automatic digital camera) which has a decent zoom capability (5X or more).I own a Nikon D-SLR, and I shot this picture of the moon on a full moon day with a clear sky.

The Moon !

Set the camera on Full Manual Mode . Denoted by "M" on the thumb dial. Set the following calibrations in your camera.
Aperture : F/11 (also called F-Stop)
Shutter Speed : 1/160 (One Sixtieth of a second)
ISO : 400
Zoom : MAX ( This is 11x )
White balance : AUTO

These are the settings with which I took this picture of the moon with quite an amount of detail and clarity.I finalized this setting after about 7 to 8 trial shots in different settings.

You might ask ... why am I using 1/160 th of a sec as my shutter speed.The basics say that for night photography we need to reduce the shutter speed to capture more light.So I should be reducing my shutter speed,making the shutter slower... Right ?. True !,Good job in remembering that basic fundamental (give yourself a tiny pat on your back :) ). But here, The moon is the brightest object in the night sky, and to capture the details of the terrain of the moon, the craters and the valleys , we need to cancel out the light just enough in order to capture those details.Other wise you would just end up with a picture of a bright overexposed white disc on a black background. And you do not require a tripod for this shot since your shutter speed is fast enough.

I found that the ISO at 400 increased the sensitivity of the sensor just enough to capture the details and at the same time I did not observe any noise in the photograph.And yes, I know you remember that high ISO (1600 +) results in more noise(grainy pictures) and low ISO (100/200) has absolutely no noise. :)

So good luck and try taking the pictures of the moon ,and impress people.

Cheers
Chakrapani

2008-05-02T10:58:00.000-07:00

Dear Blog,

It has been a while since I have blogged. But that does not mean I have stopped,or I don't intend to blog anymore. Not many reasons, but the few that are there are pretty heavy reasons.

1. Work ! Different work , tough work .
Lot of new things that I came across in my work have opened my erstwhile
clouded eyes to the realities regarding certain skills that I thought I
possessed. Misconceptions galore !. Hey ! I am NOT disclosing them here.
The routine and schedule at work keeps me quite busy throughout my time
at work and even after work. Post-office .. pre-office blah blah.I am
pretty tired to put my mind to serious writing. Poetry included,and
honestly work is definitely not the kind of muse that inspires you to write
poetry or prose. My sense of humour and my attitude have
taken a beating lately.And I seriously intend to do something about it.So
lords of literature.. help me .

2.Photography.
Very exhilarating so far .I have discovered that it is really invigorating
and does great justice to my really admirable patience.(Yeah Rrright ! )
And yes, I love it. And what I really want to do is to make my photos fall
in love with my writing. Ahem, that is after my writing standards have
risen .And with photography, the more pictures I take , the more
experienced I get behind the lens , the better I get. And what do I intend
to do with my photos and write-ups ? Post them online in the form of
travelogues and photoblogs . Food for the mind. Wish me luck.

To start with . My next post will be about a couple of examples of misused English words.I hope they are an eye opener for you as well. Many a times a person finds oneself in a split second confusion about the proper usage of a particular idiom in English. Verbal mix-ups can make you look rally sloppy no matter how smart you are
dressed up to do whatever you plan to do. Be it sales presentations, corporate presentations , or friendly conversations for that matter. Verbal misuse
and bad diction( consider this post :) )can glaringly point out a person's inability to sport differences in things , inability to comprehend things in a split second and thus inability to make decisions within time.

The bottom line is that one needs to know about commonly misused words and idioms to avoid becoming a comic tragedy !

CP

2007-11-01T20:01:00.001-07:00

A Hand Painted Buddha !

2007-10-28T09:36:00.000-07:00

An Elevated Aura
The Birla Mandir ,Hyderabad

Closer to the elevation !! ..

Elevated !!! and Elated !!
Sunset From Birla Mandir .. Nampally, Hyderabad !

(click picture for larger image )

2007-09-05T14:18:00.000-07:00

ONE OF THE BEST SONGS EVER COMPOSED ... and also one of THE BEST POETRY EVER WRITTEN !!

GOO GOO DOLLS ... OST City of Angels !

2007-08-11T11:08:00.000-07:00

THE MAKING OF ' GANGA ' !!! :) ............

Here is a phase by phase pic post of how I sketch ... Hope this interests you as my subject takes form :)

The Basicbuilding blocks ..
of human form !!
angles and curves included :P

( i was always good at geometry and Engg drawing !.. now u know why !! :) )

...................................

structure ...

.. :P

she gets shape... ( the curves !! :) )

The Dupatta ..

giving shape and flow to fabric ...

hmmmm next .... ..

AND .....

FINALLY .......... :) this is what we have here !! :) my creation .. !!

She's gorgeous !!! ???? :P Do tell me !

2007-08-09T20:45:00.000-07:00

Here Goes ... A Stand up comedy in Hindi on Abhi-Ash Wedding...

If you know proper Hindi and know the Indian Bollywood stars..

This video is great entertainment !!...

"Stand up Comedy on Abhi-Ash Wedding..in Hindi."

lov CP

2007-07-20T12:15:00.000-07:00

CP's BLUE SKY HAPPINESS .....
(click on the pics to see full resolution.. )

The moment I took the bottom snap ,I felt good .. It came out good .. Like an asphalt road to the glorious blue heaven. A smooth plain pathway to happiness.

Those little stars in the foreground are frost flowers on the window .. It was -50Degree Celcius..outside at that height !

Hats off to "Wright Brothers " for inventing Flight ! and come to think of it i actually felt like a bird . There was turbulence in the air a lot of times .. and this one time i could see the wing flap like a bird's wing . Yes !! The wing tip rose and fell quite a distance in the air ..:)

The little tufts of white clouds flashed past the window .. all i could do was to want to feel them with my fingers.. inspite of the science in my head telling me that i can never ever do that .. yet the poet in me insisting that i try . !!!

The blue shades mesmerised me as I gaped open mouthed at the blue expanse... Surprised at how a little window could open my eyes so much.

All pics .. NOKIA N-72 (human edition.. !! lol )

And If u see properly.. You can even see the Moon ! :) Yes ! I saw the moon in broad daylight.. its clear in the above snap .Right in the centre.. a white curved spec.. It was pretty clear to me.. expand the pic if you want ! :) .Well its visible in all the pics..

caio !

...CP

2007-07-17T10:01:00.000-07:00

My Random clicks in .. THE MORNING CALM .. .. Seoul , South Korea

My Bedroom ..

SIGH !

Calmest workplaces ..

Towering heights ... well lit streets, Decent controlled traffic..

8 lane roads..

Amongst the richest lifestyles on planet earth !

Ain't they the cutest things !!

The softest and the lightest too !!

And the View from my bedroom !!

Lots of thoughts flash ..when one sees the hustle and the bustle from this birds eye view ...

Love travelling .. and will be doing this a lot !! Yes , this is for me ..

Regards CP

2007-06-28T10:38:00.000-07:00

My Drive to Office !! Before and After !

This time .. i've got no words .. just my pics :) and they do all the talking !

Before............ 1............

Before ..............2......................

Distance -------> 18 Km
Avg Time Taken --> 15-20 min..

After ........... 1.............

After ............2...................

Distance -------> 26 Km

Avg Time Taken --> 75 min.. ie 1 hr 15 min

(PS :And no ! .. i never worked at a farmhouse!! .. more like a . errm human zoo !! where a certain non endangered species called software professionals worked !! and work .. :P )

2007-06-14T10:46:00.000-07:00

The MOCHA TEASE !!!

Its 6 15 PM. I'm 10 minutes early at 'Barista Espresso Bar '@ Banjara Hills Road no 1 .

For the uninitiated , its one of the happening chain of coffee shops across the Indian metro cities . Having survived a boring day at my office , I flee from my desk an hour earlier than usual . Dude 'K' 's supposed to join me at the coffee shop . We havent met for a while ... We decided to catch up . Off late , Im having this fetish for real rich flavoured coffee !. I want to escape the mind numbing traffic that plagues this city of Hyderabad , so I start early.

I find myself lookin for a cosy table and corner .This nice old gentleman invites me over to his table for a game of chess ( jeesus Christ !! I quit that game 10 yrs back! ). I politely refuse with a smile and gritting teeth(That was tough .. trust me). I get hold of this month's 'Business Week' magazine .( Hey !! I am really not that boring !! :( .... jus read on ! ) . A few feet from me a group of youngsters are settled(Ok .Im not the uncle here ) . The guys look 19 something ! and a coupla girls .. All chirpy and bubbly !. I sit down and browse through the magazine . An article on corporate work decorum and personal life in office intrigues me . I casually gaze around , waiting for Dude 'K'. I notice a tall girl join the group. She looks different . No ,Not that different !! well she appealled to me.. I Notice she is tall. Really cute . I twist my seating angle to be able to notice her more often. By now Dude 'K' has come and we greet each other. WE start talking about all the guy things in the world. (giggle ..) One of the first things he says .." Dude ... That girl is cute !! "(50 points if ur best pal approves !! ) and i Go .. "Ahan !! and .. she's tall too " (add 15 Points !!)

And I dont know what takes over me ! . Rather , she takes over me. I happen to glance in her more often than required . This is so not me .I am surprised. Dude 'K' happens to sit opposite to me ,facing her( !#$$%^#$%^##) and I am contorting myself , trying to keep her in my field of vision. His is so totally gazing at her . I turn around to look at her with a frank stare. I feel the blood rush to my cheeks as she catches my eyes looking at her.! (Gulp ! ) .I pretend to look for the waiter boy ambling behind her( and i'm Still red !). I catch her pursing her lips with half controlled giggle not meant for her friends to notice and think she pretty well knows what went over me at my end . I turn back. still twisted at my hips.!

Here is what i noticed .She is tall and beautiful . A cheerful face. The kind of faces that always has a smile on it even if does not. The kind of faces that always makes me smile !.She is sprightly and vivacious ... thin and curvy. Yes , she did sport the natural contours . Showed no signs of any weakness.... be it physical or mental. perfecto !

I order my usual at the coffee shop. A Large 'Mocha tease' with cream . A sugar doughnut for the stomach. Me and 'K' are having animated discussion over the issue of corporate work decorum( #$%^#$%^#$%^).I twist around again to glance at her.. SIGH !!! .She smiled.. giggled a little ,probably to someones joke in her group.She does not seem interested in the group. How do i say that ? well... she is just giggling most of the time , and her giggles are half hearted. She is fiddling with her purse and looking in all directions .. a high percentage of her looks seem to find our direction .( No... seriously ... !! cmon..) . She gets up and detaches herself from the group. A tiny bit of agitation. Another girl joins gets up and joins her. They walk out. Me and "K" get back to our doughnut and coffee. I am thinking of her . Wondering if she's gonna come back. ..

And back she comes .! Walking with her pal by her side. She looks surprisingly tall next to her friend . Maybe 5' 8" ... ( yeah .. i know :) !!! ) As she walks in, she looks in our direction and flicks her hair over her shoulder and gives a sly smile. SSSiiighhhh !!!! Ingratiating indeed !. (50 points!! ) The whole group gets off their chairs . I am shouting inside my head .."Oh No!! Dont go now .. Sit .. sit .. notnow.. pleeeseeee" .. They walk away from the table .. and huddle together. I heave a sigh of relief as one of them takes out a Sony cybershot !.

'Say cheeze "..... and i felt like i just ate the biggest cheeze cake ever !! LOL. i observe that she is taking her snaps in our general direction. AHA !! bells ring in my head . ! I notice that she was taking pictures strategically getting us in the frame ! ( Me actually !! :) ) . Yeah Right !!! thats whay you say ? .. Well then explain why she stands so far away from the group wen taking the snap .. and one can easily make out that she is covering more than just the group .. ..:) !! so
maybe ...possible...but yes! she did take two snaps in 'My' direction
:)

Well ..the best part was her smile.( 300 points ) she had an oval face . ..................
And our eyes locked more than 5 ,6 times ... in acknowledgement !!

Smilin at each other ......
:)

THis is soo noooooooooooooooooooooot Me!!I swear !! ..Breathe .... sloww Breathe !!!
this is not happening... :) phewwwwwwww

She was wearing flats ..simple bare front straps types .. not gaudy .. not blase . sweet and simple.(150 points ...) She wore silver anklets which werent annoying to the ear at all. In fact , they were adding to her grace ! .Anklets adorning both the feet .Off White capris and a sleeveless lavender top , ...trendy .Lavender and off white combination is very impressive (200 points ..)

:)
nice taste
very elegant

Glancing a lot..lauging a lot .. a loooot ... no seriosly !! beleive me:) ,she spoke less
was listening more... Her friends were chattering like Mike Myers in "The cat in the hat"
She was not .... She was Hot .. A thousand pardons for those who consider that term offensive.! its a compliment . More than Hot .. she was Cute .. So amazingly cute.. she blew my sensibilities away ! Definitely more more matured than the others in the group .

:P
has to be a lil elder

kept glancing here an there
our eyes !! kept meeting and smiling ..

she spoke jus twice on her phone. Phone calls and messages a rarity. She didnt leave the group when the calls did come.That scratches out any special guys !! :)

...... ANd you know what.. This is one of the few times i get soooo close to liking a girl at sight and she liking me tooo.. And i was a nanofraction away from walking upto her and asking her name.... Inspite of her deliberately walking ahead of me and dude "K" couple of times.. We walking across them a couple of times ....... ( yeah !!! i am not Kidding.. :O ) I went back to teens !!! Really , Front and back Front and back.. Me so wishing she would be alone for a while .. Which happened !! yes . Her friends departed and she started walking off in the opposite direction after a while .. I was so sure .. She would have responded positively.. Well even a negative response would have been worth it..

But I didnt have the Guts !!! :( .. And i am so regretting it ........

Whoever you are.. Dearest "MochaTease " :( jus once more.. .. One more chance !! please ..

Hope to meet you .. :P

Lov CP ..

2007-05-26T03:35:00.000-07:00

Cold Steel !! ( A POEM )

Daggers naked ... swords drawn
..I stood.. she stood..
this peircing silence ..
hurting as much as we cud
we squared off.. in this waterloo
a win with a loss ..
love to a toss
and we in exile .. coz we're done and through..

so cold .. so away ..
phone's dead.. no calls today
I spoke till i 'd choke
No .. u wont emote ..
coz u dont feel,
my heaven.. but steel
is what you feel ..
coz suddenly ..
this distance grew..
and i become..
I'm so impertinent to you

lov CP

2007-05-19T12:11:00.000-07:00

A Baby Moon Laughed Sideways.... ( A POEM )
( shhhh.... sloww..)

Dawn's peaceful, luminous blue
Intensified with the day
As did Happiness,
Blue .. Bluer... Bluest,
White puffs of Delight,
Joy overflowing,

Until Sunset
Wrapped us in tender pink
And we fused in a
passionate magenta goobye,
Earth Soul and Cosmic soul
Bursting with Beauty.

When night came ,
A baby moon
Laughed sideways in the dark...
I laughed back ...
and thought:

Halfwy across the world,
Your sky
Is filled with the same
Golden laughter,
And hoped that you ,
Twinkling eyes ....
Saw and heard ,

So that somehow we three
were joined in our gladness,
Each in our own space,
Together apart,
Distance meaningless .

And i slept
In a world
Full of smiles ..

From my Fav book .." The Bridge across Forever.."
A real poem written by Author's wife Leslie Parrish.. for the
Author ..Richard Bach

PS:
This poem is so very real in its simplicity and emotion... It moved me the first day i read it and continues to give me goose bumps even to this day.. and as i try and relate it to myself.. it sends pleasant shivers... :) i can only try though..

A note to the reader.. if you would'nt mind ..
Poems are to be read at more than leisurely pace.. in fact.. with lotsa pauses and stops.. the poet conveys meanings which can never be put in prose, which would need ten times the words of a poem... And if the target audience .. the muse for whom the poem sometimes are written.. .. understand.. Its a triumph that only a poet can experience and yet, not have the words to describe the elation !!

They are like riddles and puzzles .. eager to be solved.. by every person who reads it.. and there is no unique solution.. u just have to relate it to yourself .. ( So take it slow.. ) Now go back and read it slow.. relate it to yourself , and your life , and slowly , you'll find a picture emerging.. crystal clear...

Lov
Shehazaad / CP...

2007-04-30T11:02:00.000-07:00

COME SHARE MY LIGHT !!

I sit under the suburban sky..
White cumulus clouds drifting across.
I arch my back and shift so i can lie..
watch the clouds turn luminescent white..
Hiding the smiling brilliant silver disc bright..
And out he pops and says ...
CP go ask someone and then share my light !!

LOV CP :)

2007-04-12T10:17:00.000-07:00

THE DOUGH .. and how good things come to an end .

It was a Saturday Mid Summer afternoon. I was dripping sweat like a sponge out of a bucket . I shifted the huge brown bag of groceries onto my chest , wrapped my left arm around it.and stepped into my apartment. A four roomed apartment on the sixth floor of one of the few skyscrapers of this ever growing cosmopolitan. Sparsely furnished with cane chairs and cushions of saffron ethnic print I had purchased at the FabIndia mall. A colour Tv and a CD player music deck. Cream curtains with blue checks on the bay window softened the glaring afternoon sun and sent a glow onto the make-shift low settee made out of an extra bed mattress. A few cushions lain on the settee. Tempting .
Overcoming the invite, I ambled over to the kitchen . Opened the kelvinator Mini. And took out a can of orange beer . The midday sun had been cruel to me. I could make out the fair imprint of sandal straps on my tanned feet. The humidity and the sweat ruthless .I knew that there ‘d be salt maps on my black Tee-shirt in a few minutes. I had decided to cook today’s supper.I knew I was no amazing cook but could cook to keep himself alive. I lazed into the kitchen with the brown bag and distributed the contents onto plaintive looking half empty shelves. The kitchen was spacious with a dark and long granite platform . My cooking skills mocked the very existence of the four burner automatic stove . I stretched over the platform to reach the window sill and pushed open the windows. A blast of hot wind caught me in the face. I grunted out an expletive and shut it. 5 Pm was definitely not the time to open windows in summer .
I decided to hit the settee anyways. Letting the fan dry the sweat , I saw no reason to have a bath. Doing so , the physical effort of taking a bath at that hour would be enough to make me sweat for at least another Ten minutes. Sick city , Damn weather !!. (Scratch bath) I called up Jai
“ Dude.. wassup.. ummhumm.. yeah had Lunch… where ?? Office canteen where else? Crappy food.. Still got that grass in my throat and gullet . yeah.. I know couldn’t help it . Had no company… What was I doing in the office on a weekend ?? .. Jerking off you idiot.. ! yeah right. Had some work .Well ok cut the crap. What you doing in da evening .. come over.. lets cook some stuff. Yeah .. I said COOK.. as in “C” “O” “O” “O ” “K”… Hey why you laughing man ! .. !@$@!#$ .. What do you mean ‘nothing’ .. Whats so Funny dude !! what …You gotta sort out things with Neeti ?? What about ….. you never had anything with her .. .. Ohh Ohhk .. yeah gud luck .!! “

I woke up at 6 15 . I was surprised as I didn’t remember falling asleep. I never ever slept during the day. Either I would read a book or watch TV. New Job,new apartment , promotion, Better pay, higher work profile. Yet I felt empty. It was around 6 30. I Started my chores for the evening. I resolved I would not let the evening supper be insipid and garnished with stale whine. I changed into shorts and nonchalantly threw away my Teeshirt into the soil bin. Had a quick bath finally . I decided on making Ghee “Paranthas” with butter, mint-sauce and pickle . And if I had any strength and patience left, I’d try spiced cauliflower /potato curry. Or Maybe Poori’s with spicy tangy mashed potato curry.

I filled the apartment with Nickelback ‘s “ Far away “ and loaded the Beegee’s remix CD’s . It got me into the groove . The rock music raising my spirits and dispelling the loneliness of the day. I went hop stepping half dancing into the kitchen , and cut open the flour bag and poured its contents into an aluminium tin mom had sent me stuffed with home made condiments. Sigh ! I scooped a measured content of the dry wheat flour ( Mom had so unsuccessfully taught me ). My spirits soared to a new high ! I felt the joy a person feels when responsible for something creative. I felt like a culinary Michaelangelo . I recollected a close “friend” say “Cooking is Therepeutic..” I had shrugged it off then. My door bell rang !. Highly unusual for me to receive visitors at this hour. Jai must have changed his mind and finally decided to drop in. I walked towards the main door in my ‘atta’ (flour) smeared shorts and inner vest. Not bothering to clean up and not caring to not smear the sticky flour on the door, I open the door. .

“ GAWK !!” ..
“ Hiiii , hows you .. “ said Jolly.
“ Errm .. Ohh .. I .. I am good “

I said with a lot of stutter and without a speck of truth in my voice and which I figured she knew by the look on her face . She always read me so clearly. I always wondered if that was a good thing She knew that she had this incredible control over me but never wanted to have to do anything with it. When I moved to this place, I always had her in my mind. As to how I should react when faced with a confrontation . We had met a couple of times and then talked . Things were a lot better between us as we were talking like sane human beings , and not clawing each other’s throat. And I realized all those talks had brought in an acceptance of reality.She knew where I stayed. As she had dropped me home one the way back from a dance class some time back . We both were good dancers and still are. She is definitely better of the two. I guess we were on good terms now . But still deep down there was this string pulling at me.

“ Raj !!! Helloooooooo … Arent you gonna invite me in..?? What the heck .. I m coming in anyway..”
She brushed past me . My jaw wide open. She threw her purse on the chair and hit the settee. I didn’t know if it was OK to close the door and bolt it, so I jus closed it. I had no idea what to do. Here I was in my shorts and vest, My hands and face and arms smeared with wet flour and white powder. Standing in front of my ex flame . Six years of acquaintance. Three years of flame and three years of dust. Seventh year running . A decision on this year’s category was yet to materialize.
“ Hi “ Enchanting voice and a very ‘ kittenish ‘ look in her eyes . The hair on my spine and forearms stood up.
“Yes ! Its me ! Didn’t expect me haan ? …. Is it okay ?
Silence.Stares. ..
Is it okay ? !“

“ Hell no , is it not !! What are you doing here . In my house !! Why are messing with me. … “
I could have said that.

But no..Here is how I went .

“ Its great JOLL !. I Mean .. yeah.Ofcourse its OK , So how have you been. ? “ . I extended my hand to shake hers and sported a huge grin on my face .
“ I ve been great.. !! but .. errm is it okay if I don’t shake your hands ?? I relented and withdrew my hand realizing the mess I was in. She noticed the neatness around the house and raised her eyebrows..
“ Doesn’t look like you’ve been here for long Raj . “

I walked into the kitchen without saying a word. She went to the door and closed it firm . Walked upto the chair and placed her Dupatta on the backrest . I noticed . She noticed me noticing her. A faint smile flashed on her lips . she followed me into the kitchen while tying her open hair into a knot. She flung her head back and gathered her lush hair at the back of the head. One single twist and a pull and her lovely hair was a neat bun. She sized me up and laughed out aloud.

“ Are you cooking ?, Since when did you start cooking ? “

“Ahaan ,,, Since when did you start caring about it.. ?”

“OK , i Didnt hear that .. and Gosh! look at you , your’e a mess, lets hope you finally end up with some good stuff to eat !! ..”

I didn’t say a word . I gathered my wet flour and just smiled at her. It was stuffy . The heat of the day seemed to have its core in the kitchen. Add to it this strange tingling joyous unease in her presence . She stretched over the platform to reach into the window , flicked the latch and with a jerk of the wrist, the window flew open. A gust of cool fresh breeze blew in. her hair flew over and onto her shoulders. I envied the breeze as it hugged her . Her cotton dress clung to her skin as if never wanting to let go. And as the breeze hit her I could make out a faint outline of her curves. I let out a sigh ! And suddenly the kitchen seemed a lot cooler . I went about wrestling with the coarse dough. She hopped onto the platform , twinkle toes that she was.She part snatched the bottle of water

“ Slow down, don’t hurry it up… “ She said.
”It’s a lot like making love…” There was this sudden silence !.
“ Eh What !! “ I looked at her with raised eyebrows.
”Whoa “
It was really a long time since we had such a cozy talk.! The hair on my arms and spine stood up.I blushed. “Just …Let the moisture soak in.. Okayyy.” saying that she let a few drops fall into the round lump of dough. And coaxed me to knead the dough slow and steady. Making it soft was mighty important she said. Suddenly, this simple act of kneading the dough got us so close. Here I was ,using my dexterity and her experience , to make the most mundane thing work in life. She kept on urging me to continue mixing the dough, slowly, looking at my sinewy arms , shaking her head and add another couple of drops of water.setting a couple of strands of hair behind her ear. Humming a tune I knew she so loved but never knew the lyrics to. I got impatient and wanted to finish off the dough and start some real talk , get ready adn probably go out . I grabbed the water and a copious amount onto the large wet lump. She screamed

“Noooo.. you Ass !! you’ll mess it up .”

No I wont .. it’ll get done faster.. wait and see.. I always seen it that way.

“ Yeah right ??,.. idiot !! “
There it was . The truth was dawning in front of me . In the large dough plate .The effort I had put so far was turning into cream brown slush!.

“Idiot “…
She got down the platform, mumbling
“Thinks he knows everything …Goddammn idiot !! .. mm mm gudgud mudgud mmmghhpphd .. idiot ! PAAGAL !! “
And that was all I could make out of the slurry of invectives coming out of her mouth. I bit my lip. She rolled her sleeves behind her elbows and thrust her hands into the dough. I stepped back. “Where are you going now, Atta le ke Aao !! and come gimme a hand ! “ I did as I was commanded. My bulk kneeling in front of her authority. I felt like a pup with my tail tucked between my legs. A little more of flour and water and a couple of minutes of twisting of the wrists and palms .Temper subsided .Gentle efforts and pushes into the wet mix . A little while later she was blowing hair on her face and puffing to push a strand of hair away from her eyes and nose. I reached it with my thumb and pushed it behind the ear.

“ Thanks “
“ You’re welcome.. “

I looked out of the window . she followed my eyes. The sun had set long back and the city was coming alive with all its lights. Arcs of roadways lit with yellow phosphorous lamps . vehicles moving like ants having torchlights . Far away one could make out a beam of light climbing into the sky , an airplane! . It looked as if the earth had come alive with lights red and yellow. Semi magical it seemed to me. She felt it too. There was this unspoken affection flowing in each others proximity. Yet there seemed to be a cloud of unbending arrogance and pride enveloping everything.
Phew ! We were done with the wheat flour dough. A large lump soft and ready to be cooked into delicious fried wheatcakes we called parathas and poori’s . I saw what it took to make something as simple as a dinner. It seemed the best date I ever had. Not much was spoken but a lot of realizations had dawned that late evening. A comfort that never existed spawned and there seemed a ray of sunshine looking into my kitchen that night. I got her a can of orange juice and wondered how long she intended to stay. I was pretty confused whether I wanted her to stay or to leave. It was those states when a guy hangs right in the middle of the sky and the earth. What a predicament.

“Hey .. Im good at making aloo parathas.. , Lets make…. what say.”

She giggled. Looked hard at me. And looked down . The smile slowly vanishing . Worldspace radio started playing John legend’s “ Save room..”

“ Raj , I actually was very hesitant but I decided I had to do this , And I was here actually …to .. tell you things that were happening and had planned to leave pretty early. Walking in here and pretending as if nothing ever happened was easy. But it got tougher…….."

Silence

,I don’t know How and why now …but yes now it is .I wish you had moved in here earlier and we could have got together for coffee sometime….”

I didn’t know what to make out of that. What was she trying to get at.

“ I am glad you are as clumsy as ever. .. “ she giggled again. I mean how could she be so serios and yet show flashes of cheer at the same time .

“ Really.. ? I am ? “
“ Yeah , in a cute kinda way…It’ll help you , you see She will be a very lucky person.. “

Whoa who was she talking about.

“ I didn’t introduce you to my fiancé , He’ll be here in a some time to pick me up He’d wanted to meet you……..”
I couldn’t hear the rest. The only thing I could hear was Nelly on worldspace crooning ..

Flames to Dust !

Lover to friends …

Why do all good things come to an end…. ….

Come to an end .. Come to an end ..

. ( click here for the song ! )

LOV CP

2007-03-30T19:42:00.000-07:00

And there is senseless photography..
and there is something called 'ME'

There was this blue sky..
A setting sun piercing this huge shadow ...
That enveloping tree..
Gazing eyes belonged to me ..
The branches swayed and shadows shifted...
Seiving the rays of gold with glee..

And there is senseless photography..
and there is something called 'ME'

Kinda amateurish .. isn't it..

......... just a random click (click click)

.. .. and a random scribble..(scribble scribble ) :)

cheers ..
CP

2007-03-16T08:15:00.000-07:00

SO ... HAVE YOU FOUND YOUR NEMO ? !

And that's when I knew 'It ' had started . And that's how she came to know of my intrigue . An intrigue that was to seep into my fortress and weaken the stolidity that I was so proud of . .. An intrigue that was to have a lasting effect on me . For a long long time to come.

I had thought of my self as a sensible person.I still am ..to an extent , I think ... Errr, Ummm . But as days passed by, I seemed so opposite of what I had pictured myself to be .I began to appear to myself a lot like Brendan Fraser in Bedazzled . ( Yeah Right! .. Go fly a kite ! ). No ?

Not the hunk Brendan. The overly sentimental guy on the beach ! . Yeah Yeah .. the sentimental philosophical poetShe said that later too !.

Well I was all Butterflies and music and dance .

There was always a freshness around me that only a brain drowned in oxytoxin can exhibit !

"So ... Have you found your Nemo ? " . I quizzed her. An eager puppy with my tail tucked between my legs. I wonder now, How was I able to speak clear and concise english. With her presence only a feet away. I walked across and took my position on her friend's other side. A precaution because I feared those slender bright ivory coloured hands that could really give a stinging slap on the face. But more than the enchanting slap, It was the sharp witty verbal assault she was known to possess. I was witness to it myself. A couple of poor souls slaughtered within a few moments. I feared my predicament end in a similar fashion. Yes ! She could so do that .

But Surprise ! Surprise . she didn't ! ????? . Was I sensing something here . She raised her right eyebrow high ! :) looked straight into mine...(wweeeaaakk !!). There was a coldness in her eyes shouting "Back off", yet the pupils dilated to a galactic enormity .. they suddenly werent threatening .. and everthing seemed all the more confusing.Suddenly her eyes twitched at the corners and she broke her gaze. She glanced ahead and looked down as we walked out of the college canteen. This was so not her. She was silent. She would always complain of the crappy food. I sensed i was treading on thin ice. I dropped the topic.

Next day . Luch time.Her classes got over. I had made my pal wait for it .We looked like jokers reading the bulletin board for an hour . The bell rang , It was some kind of a special day for the class. All the girls were looking their best in sarees. And she , an angel in white-lavender with embriodery saree. Gosh !. we walked behind them to the canteen. keeping our distance. Lest their guys looking like tied puppets get suspicious. We took up a table fifteen paces away from hers. Enough to gimme a glimpse of her eyelashes now and then. I didn't realise my pal was gorging on all the pickled rice i had got for myself from home. And the fryums I so loved . That morning , She had caught me admiring her when I was boarding the bus. I had tripped on the landing and almost fell at her feet. Which had ultimately happened.

Another day , I saw her friend standing in the canteen. Alone. I walked upto her. I felt much saner in her sweet and assuring presence .

"Hey .. Wassup"

"Nuffin " . She gave a broad smile. A mischievious one at that.Her sly smile told me of a slight awareness of the state of affairs happening around .A minute and I am running out of topics to talk about. And in walks 'you know who' .My tongue drops dead. ARched eyebrows. sparkling eyes. And after a minute of her enjoying my red face and tongue tied semi solid state....

"Hey .. Wassup ?"

and I Go...

" SO...im fine.. Came down to the canteen to have Dinner .. DAmn (!#@$@!#%@$@#$@#)..errr Lunch !.. jus finished it...

My friend went hungry that day !

So.. you ladies came for Lunch too ??? "

( !@#$$ for heaven's sake .. that was the Canteen ! ) .

Humph !! ..

Every one within a earshot covered their mouth .. and I head a muffled sound .

My pal turns away as if he does'nt know me.

Well .. Ok .. See ya later . Say Hello To your NEMO from me !! "

( WHAT !!!!!!.. where did that come from ! )

I saw the smile drop , the jaw open in absurdity and eyebrows lock in a serios frown . ! I turned around and almost ran away.

( I had come to know of her assignment in a class. she had designed a pink web application prompting the users to search for nemo .. Finding Nemo ! :P )

PS: Maybe it all started with the way she did her hair....In the Break !!

CP: .......... As told to me by my friend , confidante and Mentor ,wid his inputs and tweaks .. Lov you dude.. !

2007-03-13T13:52:00.000-07:00

"WAY BACK TO LOVE !..." MUSIC n LYRICS

LYRICS :

I've been living with a shadow overhead
I've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed
I've been lonely for so long
Trapped in the past, I just can't seem to move on

I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away
Just in case I ever need em again someday
I've been setting aside time
To clear a little space in the corners of my mind

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
Oh oh oh

I've been watching but the stars refuse to shine
I've been searching but I just don't see the signs
I know that it's out there
There's got to be something for my soul somewhere

I've been looking for someone to shed some light
Not just somebody just to get me through the night
I could use some direction
And I'm open to your suggestions

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart again
I guess I'm hoping you'll be there for me in the end

There are moments when I don't know if it's real
Or if anybody feels the way I feel
I need inspiration
Not just another negotiation

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart to you
I'm hoping you'll show me what to do
And if you help me to start again
You know that I'll be there for you in the end

Honestly , This is second OST featuring Hugh Grant that I have fallen in love with.
The Siplicity of the lyrics .. the poetry, and the homely melody of the whole package(like a friend says.. LOL its got the whole package !)
And Like the Movie emphasises.. songs are like relationships. The Music builds the initial beauty and anticipation, the attraction which is so essential. And the Lyrics are the underlying emotions.. the hidden factors.. the sensitivities . And thats what music and lyrics are all about. . A relationship !

Enjoy .. This is a LOVELY MOVIE.. soft and slow ... meaningful :)

lov CP

2007-03-12T06:15:00.000-07:00

MY CELEBRITY LOOK'ALIKES !!

Ohh Yes ! Ladies and Gentlemen Boys and Girls !!. Welcome to the circus ! :)

Just the other day one of my friend, handed me this website/online tool link ,which would make a comparision of your photograph with thousands of celebrities , and finally come up with a few celebrities resembling you!.

Sounds fun right. You bet. Apparently , my friend's results were 'pretty' and satisfying :P . And yeah, I did have that skepticism of anything and everything 'Online' .( Ultimately, in the end ..finally .. blah blah . .I tasted my foot in my mouth . :) )

Suddenly
! "BE A MAN !! " I hear something . " Be a Man !"
I hear Russel Peters challenging me to try it . So I did. A thousand times . And Trust me people, I have never laughed at myself so much .

I tried like FIFTEEN ( thats 15) snaps of mine to get a decent resemblance to some celebrity some where in this forsaken world. But NO!. Not a Chance!! I guess people resembling me obviously arent supposed to be famous..nor are they ever supposed to . Sigh !

Well I Cant put all of them. The celebrities , if ever they visit this page might go berserk in the likes of Britney spears .She has truly gone bonkers ! well any ways yes ! I was going bonkers too ..watching my lookalikes .. wondering if it was really me..

Chris Tucker ! WHOA !!
Ricky Martin ! er... :) !
Henry Belafonte ! ( ???)
NICK ..someone !!!( NUTS !! )

Justin does me some justice ! :)

Some MORE ... SERENA WILLIAMS !!!! .. !@#$@%!#@$@#$ ..
I feel like an Australopethicus !.. and YEAH... Probabli all these gorgeos people will feel like killin themselves seeing THIS pic of mine . Nevermind ..

Ok Here are some more !! Knock yourself out .

CARL LEWIS !! (God , have mercy on me !!)
BOW WOW and SAMUEL JACKSON !! ( GULP )
Some Chinky babe !! .. I look like a chinky babe ! Ahem ! ( Ahem ,Kriss stay away ..)
John lennon !, Maradonna ! ( Now we're talkin :) ) And by the way.. Its not Madonna , It is Diego Maradona(Ding ! the soccer legend !) only for those who mishtook it :P.

75 % Tyler Hansbro.. WHO !!

http://www.myheritage.com

Ok .. Fine .. Y doesnt my reader let me know .. who is the best i look like .. from amongst all above :)

2007-03-09T10:32:00.000-08:00

SO NEAR ..YET SO FAR ! ( A POEM)

I feel, your every arrival ..
On receipt of the news
My face lights up with the very thought
My heart bathes in varied hues
A sense of wholeness filles up in me ...
To think that I would breathe the air that you breathe.

I reach to catch a glimpse of you in flesh and blood
Anticipation in my eyes,as i wait in the lounge,
I am already deafened by the sound of loud thuds inside me
Into a blank space I stare ...,A blank wall , a blind turn
I wonder if this is a dream; are you really there?
Is it really you, ? Can it be True?

Whispers and murmurs,Hi's and Hello's, steps approaching ,
That which rests in my bosom knows no bounds, it’s racing.
Just around the corner you finally appear,
Traveller's tear.. yet such a sparkle I swear !
I welcome you with a warm gaze and a deep revere,
A sea of mortals screaming and pushing
Receiving you this way is quite saddening
I only wish I could tell you, but dont want to, u'd understand
I am just among them Not one of them!

You look my way and wave your hand
Takes my breath away;
my imagination getting as stupid as it can
Then you throw away a flying kiss
Fluttering towards me, on my forehead it sits
You touched my soul in your own special way
Dare I think I’ll recover from your spell? Nay!

And that’s when I realize
My state of affairs; so sad and yet joyous they are…
You are so near and yet so far !

2007-03-03T00:38:00.000-08:00

AN EPIC LIFE : The Heady Adolescence (POEM ..continued)

Add another 10 years,
Tethered bliss, tons of do's and don'ts
Who cares
When them elders blare .. we WONT !
Aims and aspirations,
idols , peers , heroes , girls , guys , fun.
endless joys of reckless unfruitful years.
Sparks of physics just ignited..
physics of puberty slightly enlightened. !
Damn still not learnt ..
the purpose.. the curiosity kindles,
Trifle was the interest
Still a shackled prisoner,
trapped in the endearing entwines of teens
And it laughs , laughs at us,
that mocking laughter, sneers of sarcasm,
the prisoner within me, the soul...
cannot comprehend these ironic spasms.

2007-02-17T21:22:00.000-08:00

TOO CLOSE FOR COMFORT..!!

oye kyaa karra re ??? dooor hat !

INDIANS .... FLYING ??

DADA is BACK !! or is he ?

INDIANS ON A ROLL ! or is it just a pre world cup farce?

2007-02-17T20:51:00.000-08:00

Shirts that speak your mind!

Believe it or not — your shirt talks, and we’re not talking about the top three buttons of your shirt that are unbuttoned, or the time you got out of the loo at a coffee shop and forgot to zip up.

Anyway, there’s a lot that the colours say about you — except of course the exceptions who let their wives take all their decisions.!

Anyway, here’s a little bit of help, just so you don’t send out the wrong message… And, since men for most part couldn’t care less about the colour that they are wearing (hell, a man’s guide for women says all men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is LOL jus kidding, its the colour the sky is wen the sun is setting.. a lil purplish orangish bluish blah blah!) but since girls hang on to every word that you do or don’t say, a suggestion is you pin this guide on your wardrobe let the colours do the talking.

Black Yours truly and a follicularly challenged homie wears black shirts out to parties and clubbing — owing to lack of imagination and of course to wear the designer’s shirt to his show.
There’s other reasons too, you know — black is so much easier to wear, it looks cool with all those light blue denims, but little did we know that we were also wearing our best shag shirts (unintentionally of course!).

Black represents elegance, power, mystery and most importantly seduction.
That said, don’t wear black all the time, we know we think about sex every three seconds, but is it really that necessary to say it in so many terms?Rather go ahead an put a "Im all ready and hyper ,baby." on your forehead.!!

So, if a girl is wearing black underpants dear sire, there’s a field of thought says she will not particularly mind indulging in a little in the ‘horizontal happy happy’ squeezed between dinner, the ride home and a cup of coffee!

White Ever wondered why all our filmstars (Salman Khan, Saif Ali Khan etc) migrate to white in droves every time they make an appearance in court? Well, white besides pointing towards a higher social standing - stands for cleanliness and virtue. What did you think? They were colour-coordinating their clothes with their lawyers? LOL
For the gals, white is more often then not, meant to convey simplicity, a no nonsense, demure yet at the same time virginal “touchme-not” attitude besides of course being a little cold.

Red Colour of passion, colour of red roses and of course the colour you’re about to get a gaudy overdose of this Valentines Day .
Well, the one thing that a red shirt does denote (except a couple of ‘em that have rather distinctive AC/DC qualities) is sexual energy , excitement and strength.
That said, most people still agree that red is a colour that you should wear only once in a while – once again we don’t need to emanate sexual energy all the time – for god’s sake people that’s what is called quality control.
Same for girls – while most girls have an inbuilt clicker in their brains that turns the counter every time a guy checks her out, remember it’s important to weed (no, not smoking up, just to remove the unwanted impurities, read creeps without Mercs here).

Blue Analyse deeply and you’ll figure out that blue , denotes a loyal, knowledgeable, serious, responsible and intellectual persona. Think like a guy and blue looks good with everything and of course, blue to guys is by and large what pink is to the double-X chromosomed – a guy colour.
That all said, what should ultimately matter is how that shirt matches her carpet in the morning, when you’re making her breakfast!

Black represents elegance, power, mystery and most importantly seduction
WHITE Besides pointing towards a higher social standing, white stands for cleanliness and virtue GRAY Brainy, class, efficiency, sophisticated and confident, plus it’s a neutral colour so it matches with everything else RED Colour of passion, Valentine’s Day and sexual energy.
But wear it only once in a while, not all the time.

.............. courtesy.. MSN lifestyle !!

2007-02-14T19:11:00.000-08:00

AN EPIC LIFE: :The innocence of birth.(part 1)

Months .. not hours ,
Days .. not years,
Since I walked into this world,
Stood on the shores of human existance
and thought of bing alone.. I was , I am.

The seemingly endless times..,
A Plethora of unanswered questions,
Such wasting of the soul
was bound to happen , just dont mention.

Well all beginnings like this ?
Chilhoods frivolous... lucky, fortunate, unlucky,desolate.
A few million know not wat childhood is..
All innocence.. the shining surprises,
The little round faces, twinkling eyes,no inkling of whats in life,
of its hate , pithy, poverty ..of its purpose and its strife.

For them the very questions, the chirping of birds..?
Why does the sun shine ? ignorance is bliss , laugh awhile.
Shit its scary, what'd they do..
If they really knew, that this place is nowhere to be
Thats its joys... are difficult , and they are not free.!!

..................... to be continued... luv CP

2007-02-13T19:43:00.000-08:00

HAVE YOU EVER...

Have you ever waited to see the blossoms bloom,
Ever driven to the top of the hill... ever stepped onto the rooftop..
To watch the sun go down.

Ever stepped barefoot onto green grass,
Have you ever tried running through the mist
and chill of a winter morning.
Have you ever felt th chilled wind stinging your face.

Have you ever felt
The Sun in your eyes.. and a sudden sneeze,
The raindrop jewels in your hair,
The rainbow behind you..

Have you ever felt its massive presence,
Its deep silence ,
The stillness like a mountain ,
Yet not felt small in front of it ..

Ever seen the blossoms on a golden apple tree,
The burdened branches bowing to reach the earth..
Th pink bloom of a cherry tree,
white capped snow mountain sin the distance
and the gushing of the sparkling stream

Ever sink your feet in feets of snow..
Ever rustle the golden leaf bed of the autumn,
Ever jumped by the marigolds and the flowers
Ever fingertipped the velvet rhododendron.?

Do you know what it feels like
to inhale crisp fresh air...
Have you even thought .. of anything like this.. ??

2007-02-12T21:50:00.000-08:00

A few broken wings....
A cute sentimental heart;

A few honest things ..
and you came apart;

A few frank words and faces made sour,
please reflect, reflect on what was told;

And do not take seriosly..,coz I took
the liberty of speaking what I could'nt hold;

Have a long walk.., Hav some silent thoughts,
If you are a sensitive person.. believe me,
I'm an even sensitiver pot !!

By the way , you look better when you frown,
trust me.. I ve never seen a sweeter clown !!

... if ver u're pissed with me.. just read this. :)
luv CP

2007-02-09T20:26:00.000-08:00

A BEACON BECKONS .. (A poem )

Dark and callous..storms raged
You know them storms...
claustrophobic thoughts caged.
mind numbed the norms..
endless thoughts I engaged.

A conscience catamaran without a sail..
Them high waves thrashing the bow..
me's an artist.. trying to sail the gale
mental boat rocks aft .. high and low.

Land Ahoy !! I see a lighthouse..
guide me away from stolidity that I graze.
O golden red flame... ! shine bright ..
with grace ..tall and towering u glaze..

Get me through the storm.. I beg ,I reckon..
Be a Golden Beacon... and unto me you beckon !!

2007-02-02T11:31:00.001-08:00

...I HOPE YOU DANCE

When there is music ringing in your ears, When there is joy beating faster than hearbeat inside ur heart. When the mind joins the celebration of body and soul . When you know its the moment to express yourself to the maximum , because you need to celebrate your own existence. When you feel so selfish... that you really dont care what others have to say...

Then I close my eyes.. let the acoustics take me somewhere.. Little sinusoidal waves floating through the air.. lighting up the atoms that constitute my body and mind. Filling them with enough energy to light a thousand atomic bombs .. and Off i go .. like a spring coiled existance.. legs and hands .. closed eyes. Till beads of sweat pour on my temples... and a heavy regular breathing .The Beat of the music syncs with the movement of your body.. a marriage of
human body .. human mind and music that controls it all..
Feel the rythm and the music . Let your body be the Music .. DANCE !!.. Start dancing..
Make your own music.. its yours .. you dont need no instruments.. just Dance!!

2007-01-21T21:26:00.000-08:00

HA !! MUSICVideo !!

" caution: ! needs 2 mins of patience for the song to load !!! "
"pre-caution: click on load .. at least listen if u can !! :) "

FAR AWAY ..by NICKELBACK

Lyrics :
This time, This place
Misused, Mistakes
Too long, Too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance Just one breath
Just in case there's just one left'
Cause you know, you know, you know
[CHORUS]
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me and you'll never go
Stop breathing... if I don't see you anymore
One my knees, I'll ask
Last chance for one last dance'
Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand

I'd give it all I'd give for us
Give anything but I won't give up
'Cause you know, you know, you know
[CHORUS]
So far awayBeen far away for far too long
So far awayBeen far away for far too long
But you know, you know, you know
I wantedI wanted you to stay'
Cause I neededI need to hear you say
That I love youI have loved you all along
And I forgive youFor being away for far too long
So keep breathing'Cause I'm not leaving Hold on to me and, never let me go...

OK people.. brace yourself..

Fact:
I am a music freak.. my love .. har ! har ! .I am not much of a
journo to write a professional article ..Esp a music review..but then I have heard enough
music to have a melodious ear! (mark that. .. only ear !).

Fact:
Well..I can play a little with whatever miniscule vocabulary I possess.....
"Pretty Pathetic Poetry n Prose" ..and I would say that's very much taken care of. An
my words breathe their last only in my posts.

Fact:
Was an amateur in stage acting and dramatics.And then what happened !?....My
professional 'greek god' good looks put an end to
that .But anyways if its got to do anything with expressing an emotion.. I'm good.But as
you know they never considered that aspect for a theatrical/motion picture career any
way.

Oh! for Gosh's sake CP.. get to the point.. YES ... Here it goes... From the indisputable 'Theory of relativity ' I conclude that the afore mentioned song has a near perfect combination of Music..,Lyrical Poetry... and emotional outpouring..... :). The music is contemporary and hummable. No instrument overused... just the right amount of all streams to give the overall mild heavy rock feel thingy.The starting strumm sets the mood . A'ight.. and the lyrics... Ahh..:) One of those one in a million songs that can be so simple yet so profound in describing the singer's thoughts. And that is where the poetry connects to the emotion associated with the theme of the song: Love ..longing and Hope !!

Fact:
Every song /poem has a unique listener, singer, reader... who relates to the song in his own unique feeling .

Say ,I am away from someone .. and long to be close...or for that matter you miss somone you havent even heard yet !! but feel like u have connected... (For all those of u who are assuming things right now!! Drop Dead.. !! I am a poet for chrissakes !!and may lightening strike me dead !!) . And for those who want to get back to someone ... another chance....:) and a lot more. Trust me I can rant on.. an on :)

A'ight .And the finale.. (oh .. im sorry.. there can never be a finale.. ) the singer does absolute justice to the soul of the song. The tone and pitch.. laden with craving , desire and a feeling of drunk yet sane , hanging in space 'desperation'. The flow of the words and the voice.. makes the song beautiful even without the acoustic accompanyment. Well what about the video , u say .Its no nonsense video.. no gals butt shaking.. .. (thanGawd!!) no real smart hot guys.. But its got a lot of heat n fire ..:) All real life, all real desires, all real hurt ! all real joy! all real realisation... ALL REAL SONG!

lots more to it... :) u gotta feel it.!

regards CP

2007-01-18T05:50:00.000-08:00

AHA !!

No wonder being an Indian never ceases to amuse me.. and thats exactly why i like being one !

2007-01-10T10:13:00.000-08:00

WHITE SHROUDS OF NOTHINGNESS ! (Poem)

At my desk..
An existence at rest,
My emptiness devoid of fear.
A blank wall to the rear.
Bright light hurtling..
A powerful shafted spear,
Switching the lamp off,
I giggle in contempt and scoff,
at the precocious mind..
enveloped in white shrouds of nothingness!

In motion..
An acceleration at rest,
Man and machine I steer.
Machine throbs at a higher gear.
Black body speeding..
A Destination unclear,
bring to neutral..ignition off
I stare and jeer,
at the listless face
emblazoned in dull expressions of nothingness!

A flickering screen..
A pardoned cursor at rest.
My Thoughts ..I shift delete and cache clear.
Pentium spirits laid waste,
Days and hours hurried in haste,
Close them windows and shutdown..
I scowl and frown,
at the dark reflecting monitor
showing a true mascot of nothingness !!!

REGARDS.. CP

2007-01-06T06:51:00.000-08:00

MUSE !

2007-01-05T07:41:00.000-08:00

A CHESTNUT GAZE.. (poem)

That Chestnut gaze ..

my senses set ablaze.

High arch of the brow..sigh

oh my god !!.. , WOW !

I cross my butter fingers ..

I close my eyes ..

That face still lingers !!

Soft black silken strands..

a flick of the hands..

swoosh...go tufts of hair

set behind the fine ear..

A twist of the wrist ..

face comes for'ward..looks deep

Oh my god ! I skip a beat...

Damn!! i cant feel my feet.

A precious curve still wet

A glow on a pink marble face..

Rows of Delicate Ivory set..

between the double rozy glaze

Oh my GOD!!.. May Lightening strike me down

Coz it hurts to see you too long !!

2007-01-03T10:02:00.000-08:00

Never say never again..

Umm.. Errr what was that! Doesn't it sound like a 007 flick ?? Yes it does .. but unfortunately.. the character I am talkin about ( me !! ) is no more an agent 007 than you , the reader .. are a Miss India 2007( and I have no friggin idea who she is !!! and no offfence at all to my male readers .. :) ). And I care less. It would have mattered probably if she was sitting behind me on my bike and holding on tight to me , braving the cold .. (jus a lil cold :))
The Point is, how many times , Have you had to tell yourself .."NAVER AGAIN " ..for anything. Be it a matter of stupidity at office, be it lookin like a clown in the midst of groups of guys and gals..(the fact that all the other guys are much better looking than you, adds to your !@$@#!@#$ plight), Be it being wounded in a relationship, Be it being momentarily crazy on road.. or shouting at a senior family member for being impossible and then regretting it.

And Having said it once .. you almost always end up doing the same thing again and again
and again,
and again,
and again....
Do i have have hurt myself physically to effect that sense into me ! Well no, I dont think so.. I am soo much in love with myself , i cant(read 'wont') do that to myself . :)

So what do you do ?
What do you do .. when u are at a crossroads and dont have an idea which direction you want to go.. you want to try everything .. But remember, the last time you tried the same thing, you ended up at this predicament, with all its eccentricities and fun and blames.

Hell yeah .. jus walk on ahead .. and never think about it again.. :)

2006-11-20T20:50:00.000-08:00

Together ... Going up !! (A Poem)

My inertia .. My ignorance,
Swept away by a joyous thunderstorm.
Every chiding.. seems a sweet cadence
Cymbals and lutes ..i hear ,
for it fills my every nerve and every song !

My non existence.. a weedy verdure,
And affliction you induce,
and yet with your enchantment you cure..
An incantation in your eyes did sparkle,
i wish for ur presence , your existence so pure.

A smile on the lips
sets an ebullient soul a-sigh !
Sweets stings of glancing glances
Send shivers of sunlit arctic joy !

Cascades of emotions
of lows and highs..
Spasms of wonderment and surprise
I look ahead.. at the horizon,
sitting by the seaside..
And as every atom ignites
shock waves of Tears and wonderment ..!!

I ask the spirits..
"Together . . We are goin up !"
Hail Buoyant pain ! ,Hail Buoyant joy!
Beauty Ahoy !! Life Ahoy !!

2006-10-25T22:22:00.000-07:00

A SWEET MIRE ..( A poem )

Cherry on your cheeks
Twin suns of thee eyes..
thoughts that match ur brows height
yes !! looks do kill guys..
make us board a heavely flight
and mind that annihilates us completely so .

i look to thee .. no longer alone i go ..
I drown deeper in this sweet mire..
brightness brighter yet softer than a fire,
deeper i sink..closed eyes.. yet i fly higher..
deeper i fly ...open eyes.. higher i drown..

2006-10-18T11:15:00.000-07:00

Congratulations !!! You just had a baby boy ! er... Without the eyes !!!

Yes, please bear witness to the wonders of modern industrial and chemical revolution.
Kids born without eyes. Fused eyes, to be specific.Symptoms of Frasers Disease. Suspects: Dioxin agents/fertilizer chemical called 'Orange'.

Your turn !!

2006-10-03T10:28:00.000-07:00

Of Swings and a Moonlit Sky ...

She sat waiting, On the porch steps . The winter was just settling in . There was a slight chill in the air. A welcome change from the sweat and humidity of the month. The summer had been cruel . It had sapped the life out of the garden and the bottled money plants she so loved and nurtured. The sky was clear . She lifted her chin high and arched her neck to look into the dark blue black expanse above her. She adjusted her palm around the white china bowl she was holding . She did not want to spill the veg Manchow she had learnt to make from the chinese cookbook . It took her the whole afternoon getting things together and another hour at dusk to prepare it. He had given her a tring in the evening and had asked her to get ready to go out for dinner. She had politelyexcused it by saying she had already got home stuff to eat. It had been quite a while since she had prepared anything at home. Work had been really sapping for both of them for the last few months. Yes ! he would be surprised !
He had come a few minutes back, and nonchalantly went ahead to freshen himself . The two white china bowls shimmered under the moonlight. He still had not come out into the portico . She took all the time to lay out the garden table and chairs , with the soup bowls filled to the brim. She tiptoed in and got back with the vinegar , pepper and salt holders. Discernible wisps of steam curling into the darkness above the cups. Nestling a bowl in her palm, feeling its warmth, she walked upto the black, wood and wrought iron swing on the edge of the lawn.

He walked out saying he was feeling hungry and he had work to do. Towel around his neck .. he walked towards her, amused at the serenity she was exposing. A naked tenderness in her twinkling eyes. It was as if there were two shining stars down on earth. He forgot everything. Walked up to her . A smile strengthened by her gaze. Sat down next to her. She could feel his warmth next to her. He picked his bowl and beamed at her. Deep down she hoped he would like it, the soup .. It was a mild warm.. he didnt mind it, he gulped it down. Savouring every drop of it. Talking of the days rigours .. they soothed their parched souls and could feel the distances narrow. Keeping the bowls aside., She leaned on his shoulder, in the nook of his neck and looked up into the sky.He could smell the lavender fragrance of her shampoo in her hair.. as it whiffed against his chin and cheek.She giggled as he almost sneezed. The stars were looking down on them.. blessing them.. The moon peeked at them from behind the palm leaf ..A perfect smile as they both saw the sky at the exact same time . The gentle breeze tugged at her hair... and he kept pushing it behind her ear.!! He felt a faint hum and music in his ear..hummmmmm bzzzzzzz..

WHAACK !!!

"Damn these mosquitoes !!!! , Lets go inside !!! "

2006-10-01T08:49:00.000-07:00

When it Rains in Hyderabad !

Ok , I have always been in awe of Hyderabad and Secunderabad. Why ? There are so many stunts happening in and around. That one is never not surprised. People are incredibly stupid, or extremely foolhardy. And there exists no other category. Those who move into the twin cities
curse this particular attribute of the contemporary cityfolk, and after a while are proud exhibitionists of the same !. All caution thrown to the winds. Now.. now , I am .. a proud part of this group myself , I rile my fellow brethren and sistren (go ahead , look this up in the dictionary!! It aint there ;o)) sneer sneer ) for being so inconsiderate about their own well being. But I really dont know what to think of this behaviour which is so incomprehensible and undescribabble. (Babble ... did I say babble... ? yes I did and I mean it.)
Ah . Coming to the single thing which keeps this diverse , well knit (more of knotted ) people tangled together . 'An absolutely irresponsible , uncanny and resolute traffic sense ' .
Yes, that and an awesome hyderabadi flavour of abuses accompanying the traffic. Which , by the way, can be surprisingly audible amidst all the din.
And when it rains .Hyderabadi hell breaks loose. And the brakes get loose too .. There is knee deep water on the main artery of the hyderabadi road network.. Cars are stranded, Autos are weaving around to maneuver into the tiniest of gap they can find so that they are at advantage . And that gap ultimately gets occupied by a broiler chicken laden chetak scooter. So here we have an auto wedged diagonally across the road where cars are neatly lined up for almost 2 km. You will ask, why is'nt the traffic moving at least a trifle ? because, the gentlemen at the front , whose car got stuck in the deepest water, thought better of the situation and locked his vehicle and sped off with an alternative (Walk!)!!! . Ingenuous isnt it .
Sigh ! Sob ! Slosh ! .
And my fine leather shoes are ankle deep in water. Another gentleman prefers to wrap a plastic bag around his feet , bound to his shin using a rubber band. People get a real good exercise to their fingers.. thanks to constant braking and clutching . Nerves are shot , tempers are flaring . One can hear "Bhaadakhows ". "Bhosedeekays" .. "chutiye maakeyodes " flying in the air as if they were tracer bullets. People vying for every foot of the road they can get to get moving forward. Some audaciosly lay claim to the clearing in front of them and if another accomodates himself, the others happily gain the spoils while the verbal duel is going on .

The Hyderabad municipal Corpn is prides itself for its work of maintining the city. At any point of time at night or day , one can see garbage dump trucks shuttling here and there. There is one major landfill within the city. But most people would agree that these trucks empty half of its garbage onto the road while plying . God have mercy on ur nostrils if u get stuck next to one of this cantankerous , obnoxioiously stupefying , odoriferous creatures !!. I wouldnt be surprised if anyone refuses to sit next to you for the next two days. Stench !! man Stench !

The traffic jams are a class apart. We have different traffic jams.

The Kissan Jam : The cause of which is either a convoy of bullock carts carrying grass or household paraphernalia , manned generally by a septagenarian who is oblivious to the advancements to the transport business. It is his birth right to use this government road at speeds of 5-10 km / hr . If its a convoy , the underfed and famished bulls always end up having grass hanging from the cart in front. Also in this category , come cycle-wallahs and cycle rickshaws, and hawker gaadi's selling fruits and chaat, averaging the same speed. No hard feelings , you people.. we know your situation. We jus are cursing our predicament !

The Tutti fruiti Jam : The cause of which are vintage , cantankerous squeaky vehicles which somehow the owners still think will run good on Hyderabadi roads. I have little idea as to why this obstinacy to drive the scrap metal onto the roads. Is it loyalty ? sentiment ? but one thing that is certain that these cars , scooters and autos belonging to semi prehistoric era always end up breaking down in the middle of the road , at peak hour !.

The Mixed Fruit Jam : The cause of which is human psychology , bratty youngsters with powerful zipping engines , nerve shot business executives , loud mouthed Auto rickshaws and oodles of arrogance and tempers. This mostly happens at crossroads . Autos are wedged at wierd angles. Motorcycles are trying to maneuver from underneath the trucks. Small cars are trying to take U turns because their dealer said they had an amazing turn radius and they never really got an opportunity to do so. Ah , The mammoth menace , AP RTC public transport buses trying to execute a right turn from the left end of the road. thus creating a tight deadlock!.Not to forget the drivers consider themselves 'Schumacher' proteges.

And the only interesting one can do .. amongst many that can be done.. is read the bumper stickers , catch phrases at the back of the vehicles

HORN! HORN! (no wonder .. )

"BLOW HORN then SIDE given !" (oh really !)

"BURI nazar wale tera muh kaala ", "Mard ", "Dard" (ouch !)

"DAd's gift " , "Chicago bulls " , "O baby Doll" , "Screaming eagles "

"Dil wale dulhaniya lejayenge " ( is traffic mein koi aur byah lejayega ;)) )

And some have reason to thank traffic jams for finding a soulmate !!! :o)

Sigh ! sic ! Groan ! Slosh !

Dear heavens i could go on and on ....

2006-09-13T07:00:00.000-07:00

And Today ... I Ran... I RAN!!! !

More than 5 months since i ran last. I had run in the morning then. With a fresh mind , to gulp in the greenery.To breath into my lungs the hovering dew of the early morning. I felt bright and the run made me feel physically exhausted, yet mentally satisfied.
And I ran today . In the evening !. Only 'teen' times i would have done that through my life so far. Came back from office at around half past six. Changed into tracks . Without a word spoken , I dashed out.
The skylight was dying. The sky, a grey blue turning dark navy . Nothing was on my mind. Or maybe I did not want anything on my mind ?. There were dark clouds gathering in the distant horizon .Flashes of lightening.No thunder though. As i started walking briskly, the trees lining the road hid the threatening clouds looming in the yonder."I have to get back before it starts raining..." Not because i dreaded getting wet. But more like a challenge,when pitted against the inevitable .
Fifty yards of brisk walk and then i started into a skip , a hop and then into a gallop. I clasped my lips shut.My nose flared open. I took a heavy breath every three gallops. (RULE:1 One never breathes through the mouth when in a run, this is undisputed throughout the running community. It accumulates foam and dries the mouth, causing thirst twice faster than required.)

After about 200 mts .. a searing pain ripped at a single point in my abdomen towards the left side. My lungs felt like a furnace. I had to slow down. I gradually came down to a jog. Disappointed . I trotted along in my jog for the next 20 mins. Everytime i gave a burst on my legs .. a few hundred yards and the pains shrivelled me back to a trot. At a bend on the run I reached a tree with a swarm of mosquitoes as thick as a 1990 Ambassdor classic's exhaust(horrible simile !! i Know ! ) . I invaded their buzz and ran through them, hundreds hitting my neck and face. Some digging into my horse sized nostrils. Hundreds buzzing into my ears and countless stuck inside my tees. A minute of thrashing about and flailing my arms , and a couple of elaphant sneezes later ,I continued my run .
30 mins since I started. My head got heavier. I thought I was running smooth. ( RULE: 2 The smoothness/effortlessness of a run is estimated from the noise the feet make ... the lesser the noise.. the smoother and more effortless the run).But I started to realise i mustave been making a noise like a duck with a flipper on a road. My arms were swinging wildly as if i was forcing myself ahead by pushing the air. I i was breathing heavy.The was like an ice pick piercing my abdomen. I felt i was breathing fire. A motorist passing by stared at me in disbelief. Didnt have a second to stare back (RULE: 3 which i generaly do in those cases !give a steely stare back)

My head started to swing like a ping pong ball. I guess people could hear my tread a hundred yards away. A hundred metres ahead, A grandpa turned around to see who it was (me !) disturbing his peaceful walk and frowned . I finally jogged home 2 and a half kms later. I was walking. I couldn't feel my legs . I climbed the steps to the open terrace on the second floor. Did a warm down (RULE:4 One needs to stretch and warm down before and after a heavy run or workout to relax the muscles and avoid muscle cramps the next day.)
Short jumps and stretches .. a PT drill for a minute. I sat down . The sky a pitch dark. I could hear thunder booming in the distance. i felt my head swing . I could see my eyes redden . The red viens formed a pattern on my vision.I sat down and took deep slow breaths. I could hear the thunder again.. but very regular.. like a cannon firing every second !!. I felt my throat throbbing . I felt someone punching me in my back for like 100 times a minute !! My HEARTBEAT !! .. I wanted to relax.. Couldn't .. It wasnt a great run!! but why did I . Was I running away from something !! Or was i Running for something i Wanted... leaving everything behind .............

10 minutes and half a dozen bananas later. This is keyed down ..

Adious amigos , Gracias !!

2006-08-01T00:09:00.000-07:00

LOST IN SPACE ...........

Many Moons
The roster of Jupiter’s extended family keeps growing—61 moons at last count, including Io. As seen here, Io hovers just above the Jovian cloud tops—but in fact keeping its distance 217,500 miles (350,000 kilometers) away.

A Star is Born
About 100 million to 300 million years after the big bang, in what had been an ocean of darkness, the first star was born. It happened inside a swirling cloud of hydrogen and helium gas gathered together by the gravity of dense, invisible “dark matter.” As the gases cooled, the center of the cloud collapsed into a dense clump. Over hundreds of thousands of years the clump in turn collapsed, triggering fusion and the birth of a star.

Winds of Change
Winds as strong as a thousand miles an hour (1,600 kilometers an hour) stripe the atmosphere of Saturn in an ultraviolet image captured on March 7, 2003, by the Hubble Space Telescope. The rings surrounding the planet are composed of dust and ice.

The Greatest View
No matter how many times astronauts have photographed Earth during two decades of space shuttle missions, the image in the rearview mirror has never become routine: that perfect blue marble, whorled with white, suspended against blackest space.

Big City Lights
Bright lights reveal big cities in western Europe, Japan, and the eastern U.S. in this composite image of the planet at night from military weather satellites. Other less urbanized places, such as western China and most of Africa, remain dark.

Living Large
Hats off to Hubble’s spectacular image of M104, the Sombrero galaxy, 28 million light-years from Earth. One of the most massive objects in the dense Virgo cluster of galaxies, the Sombrero’s bright core contains a black hole a billion times the mass of our sun.

Space Drifter
Untethered from the space shuttle, Bruce McCandless II drifts 217 miles (349 kilometers) above Earth using a nitrogen-propelled backpack in February 1984. McCandless was the first to use the pack he called a “great flying machine” for a space walk.

Foot Loose and Fancy Free
John Young gives a playful salute during the Apollo 16 lunar mission in 1972. A close look reveals that he’s bounding a foot and a half (46 centimeters) off the lunar surface. On Earth, Young in his bulky suit would have tipped the scales at almost 400 pounds (200 kilograms), but on the moon he weighed only about 65 pounds (30 kilograms).

2006-07-31T23:41:00.000-07:00

Cat Chases Bear Up Tree

Perhaps not since the Cowardly Lion has an animal's appearance been so at odds with its attitude.

On June 4 a black bear wandered into a West Milford, New Jersey, back yard, was confronted by a 15-pound (7-kilogram) tabby cat … and fled up a neighbor's tree. Hissing at the base of the tree, Jack the clawless cat kept the bear at bay for about 15 minutes, then ran him up another tree after an attempted escape.

Finally, Jack's owner, Donna Dickey, called the cat inside, and the timorous trespasser disappeared back into the woods.

"He doesn't want anybody in his yard," Dickey said of Jack in an interview with the Newark Star Ledger.

Unlike cats, bears aren't typically territorial, roaming instead over vast areas that would be impossible to patrol for intruders. With a habitat that includes much of North America, black bears are seen fairly often in this region of New Jersey.

Full-grown black bears weigh between 200 and 600 pounds (90 and 270 kilograms) and measure as much as 6 feet (1.8 meters) long. Their diets can include fruits, honey, insects, acorns and animals as big as moose calves—a fact apparently lost on Jack.

2006-07-20T11:05:00.000-07:00

'Pen' Strokes of a Strange Bliss

His back pressed against the small yet cosy couch . Just enough to sit two.She sat at one end watching one of those holiday tours they show on 'Travel and Living' . Smiling a while, contemplating a while. He contorted his lithe frame to fit the remainder of the couch.Surprisingly flexible for a guy so slender.He lifted his legs in the air .One feet on the armrest, one across the raised knee , his feet almost reaching the switches .A wiggle of the toe and the lights could go dim ! .He put his head on her lap as she sat .She raised her arm to let him place his head, and put it across the backrest.He saw her smile as she engrossed herself into the sight of clear white sands of the beaches of New Zealand !! . He understood and let loose a mischevious sparkle in his eyes . He gazed at her chin jus a foot away from his lips .Her long eyelashes fluttering with quick blinks . He craned his neck at the television to see what it was that was captivating her so. He immersed himself into the scenery on TV. Soft Azure blue of the ocean.. the breeze on the coconut palms and the green ferns . He wanted to connect to her through the thoughts of a vacation she possibly was thinking . But he missed something.The moment he had turned his glance away from her and onto the TV set,She stole a glance at him.A softness dripping through her eyes . She was aware of his eyes all the while looking at her . She slowly got her hand onto his forehead and pushed his hair back. Ran her finger through his hair gently . They ran in circles .. her fingers . Giving him a strange bliss . He shut his eyes.. She got her other hand onto his chest . She could feel the rippled abs. And then Closer to his face she felt his cheek with the back of her hand , as slow as u would want to feel a crimson rose petal . Right from his ears down to his lips . A soft smile dawned on his face as he drowned in the pleasure of the moment . She bent down and kissed him of the forehead !!!

2006-07-17T23:09:00.000-07:00

MALAISE ! Mother Earth..

They had you scorched
They had you hurt
O Earth ,but never would u tell,
such misery , such pain
and the malaise that befell.

Your splendour , your greens,
chopped down all brown ,
you never would complain
A single buzzing heave of the chainsaw
burning splinters orange bright
Oh yes ! you can see the doomsday night!

Bygone the happy days of protection and gratitude
"o mother! o mother! we for thee!" those cries so loud ..
blew away with smoking chimneys of time
and the children lived.... sans compassion
and you cried ..with the burning splinters orange bright!

would the sentinel rise ! a mass .?
the name that be youth
not one not two but countless to make you soothe
and strive would they ? that this monstrous hell..
this malaise, would never again swell !!!

2006-07-16T06:05:00.000-07:00

ohh yes !! im back ..

Not with a bang though. And no , no more letters to the blog now on.I guess this relationship is going to go like this.sometimes we talk, sometimes we wont.And i know ,i have to take the initiative. So ..? QUE PASA ? (Oh ! That means 'wassup ' in spanish !).And i picked it up from a great senorita(pronounced 'seneorrita') online !. hmm Pretty hard stuff thrown at me from work side!! Things i have to gulpwith a pinch of salt .Down my gut! One month of horrendous typhoon in my head! It wasnt much about the toughness or the technicality of the work.But was demeaning . Not worth blogging on! Waste of bits and bytes that post on this page!

Anyways... been reading some National Geographics lately !! once again I reiterate "IT EES DA BESST MAGAZINE IN DA UNIVEERSE! " And it took just one flip through to get another clooose pal to get hooked to it ! Im soooooohappy i got another soul hitched !and just in case you happen to be reading this.. (Which by the way, you are .. if u are here).My sincere advice would be to go get yourself a copy of the "National Geographic Magazine"(it has a trademark bright Yellow border)
Hey !! tell me .. have u done any 'good'. Good as in 'constructive good' .Not like u know , giving a rupee to the begger at the crossroads.BTW.. there are hoards of them at this particular junction in Hyderabad! ,and hyderabadis reading this would have already guessed it right! its 'Paradise junction'. Digressions apart,I was talking about 'constructive good'. The kind of thing that makes u swell with compassion and pride!!! yep ... Something's for me down the corner.Something i can extol myself with. Spend my energies on!!
I'll gather more information abt this and enlighten u all people.Its worth it.. All you gotta do is just spread its awareness.

CAIO for now !

2006-05-24T00:44:00.000-07:00

An Actor's masquerade
Life is an unending Act, My Actor says,
And I,a mere mortal in space.
Some scenes vitriolic,.. some stoic..
pretence lingers like blood in my vein,
And i reign the act,And i rein the feign.

Life is a unreal act ,My puppet Says,
And i perform ,mere puppetry on stage,
Some strings stretch, some strings break.
In vain ,i try to join the strings again,
And i reign the Act,And i rein the feign.

Life is a blissful fact,My ignorance says,
And I behold, mere ignorance in my gaze.
Some glances stay...,Some glances faze.....
I crave life's erudition,and it gives me pain
And i reign the Act,And i rein the feign.

Life is a pact,My tenure says,
And I number,all the moments I endure,
Some memoirs guilty...,some memoirs so pure.....
I continue to act,till my myriad life is lain
I shall reign the Act, I Shall rein the feign.

Life is for me to enact,my selfish soul says,
To impress an existence ,in other people's days,
Some people exist...,Some people fade...
My masterpiece,in all souls should I remain,
only then I have 'lived' the Act.... I Have 'lived' my name

love CP

2006-05-21T12:45:00.000-07:00

Mirror mirror on the wall
who's the scariest of them all ?

IS it The common burgler with thefts so neat ?
wry smile ,warm eyes, not a glint of cheat!
Ach ! but desperation drives him..
Calculated intelligence he puts to feet.
Not sans humanity, but isnt it hunger that fuels his heat!

Mirror mirror on the wall
who's the scariest of them all ?

Is it The murderous psycopath we never know ?
the neighbour uncle ..and his alter ego !
Ach ! Science and law are but helpless..
power ,graft ,revenge..in him dont grow
for he,nor anyone knows not why he crazes blood so?

Mirror mirror on the wall
who's the scariest of them all ?

Is it The minister of state ,the clerk of a company,
Beaureucrats ,clerics, even peons swindling money. ?
Ach ! Not power but indomitable greed.
He Gathers property , gold , for his blood to breed,
These.. are just degenerate humans devoid of creed !

Mirror mirror on the wall
who's the scariest of them all ?

Is it the fanatic.. a communal messenger of doom
Quotas for his caste , religious beliefs for whom ?
Ach! this is mob mentality.
He strikes,he protests,he has fanatics to groom ..
a school bus ..the marketplace. Nitrates . Detonators .. KABOOM!!

Mirror mirror on the wall
who's the scariest of them all ?

Oh mirror ! I have no more patience .. for i pain
tell me .. show me.. anything else is vain..
For i shall confront them ,with vehemence and disdain
Ach! Magical mirror ,you are a farce..
for none my queries do u entertain..

WAIT !!

Ach ! So you are magical!!..
I see your reflections catch some grain..
a blurred fugurine ,the root to all society's pain,
Yes ! Yes ! this villain.. uncover him,........
HEY ! What is this .. O miror Why do u show me NAKED ,and with stain !!

2006-05-04T11:18:00.000-07:00

A comedy of Errors... ( Part 1)

Oh yes.. !! The Shakespearean comedy. A tale of twins and separations and mistaken identities. A perfect setting for a classic comedy. He apparently had the high intellect and capacity to think of an intricate build up of the characters and settings to the story .Or is It ? .... Maybe the exact opposite of that particular human trait(Common sense and intelligence ... ummm..er sometimes overuse of it!) can also prove beneficent in providing interesting and embarrassing situations of stupidity and comedy.
. The thing is... ' The Bard ' was not aware of the existence of a few lowly software engineers ( Genus Homosapien SoftwareManiacus) , a couple of hundred years down his time.
Them evolution specialists and zoologists are still trying to figure out their hierarchy in the food chain(this continues to be a scientific mystery).Well ,in this case, most of the subjects are not exactly maniacs in software development. Rather , they are driven to the extremes of mania because of it.

Act 1 :
Characters: 'C '- a young jovial cheery eversmiling freshman into the IT industry
'R'- a young jovial but pensive freshman into the IT industry.
x, y, z.. A few gorgeous young ladies wrongly placed in the IT industry.
Situation: At a coffee vending machine , like countless other It freshmen Mr 'C' and this
group takes a break from a horrendous work routine and reaches for a paper
cup . There is a lot of tension in our guy's head. No , not as in frustration at work
dum dum u!!, but the presence of fine ladies has other things running in his
head. Mr 'R' is always wary of ladies and exhibits rainbows on his face whenever
approached by them.Shades of red are his forte ! . And Mr 'C' is th ultra smooth
one. the polished one with the courtesies and all. Mr 'R' keeps muttering curses
on 'C' .. damn u man!!
With great poise our 'C' takes the places it under the coffee vending
nozzle . Turns around smiles at them ladies behind him.. raises an eyebrow..
turns ahead again presses the button for TEA !!! turns around nonchalantly ,
holding the coffee cup with his hand. Mr 'R ' roars into peals of laughter and the
lovely girls giggle graciously as 'C''s expressions are at the zenith of embarassment.
Hot tea pours onto his wrist , Gritting his teeth he holds on to the grin he is
bravely sporting on his face. Thirty two twinkling white teeth can do
nothing to hide the shade of red that used to be so attached to Mr 'R'. Mr 'C'
elegant that he is( oh ! Crap !!), saunters off into the washroom , leaving behind a chorus of
laughter from our gang!

Act 2:
Characters: The one and only ...Mr 'C'
Situation: Its Appraisal time in the company. People are busy trying to recollect what productive thing they did over the past year.(Which we can be assured , is negligible ! ).The submission deadline is 10 AM. After which the online fecility becomes disabled.An Autoescalation takes effect which gives the managers the opportunity to 'Turbogear' the subordinate's career into oblivion. :) Mr 'C' has pay a visit to the bank at 10 15 Am for an examination fee payment. He also has to attend an important issue call in his bucket(read as 'his responsibility' ... but really apt !! "Balti" in hindi sounds better) at 11 00 Am.
Mr 'C' fills out successfully his achievements with a little help from Webster's dictionary.(Aware of the fact that all the effort is vain anyway ). He is also successful in helping a coupla other pals filling out theirs. 10 10 Am he is out and buzzing towards the bank... the hot scorching sun roasting his arms .... Arriving in time , is relieved there is no queue.Fills in the particulars .. pays in Cash !!(Hey .. he barely is surviving on what he gets for his sweat and salt !) . Packs the change into his purse.Walks to the enquiry counter . Picks up the Sling bag he had placed earlier on the customer's chair. Walks out .Check's the time. 10 35 Am . WOW ! .
Bang on time !. With a Smugness that never existed , and a sure gait that he never walked, he takes out his bike.. gives a blast on the accelerator...(Heads turn). Our guy smiles in acknowledgement to all those who see. Man it feels great to be in control... !!doesn't it ? .Zooms back to office unmindfull of the sun on his temples and forearms. Reaches the cubicle , logs into the system knocks his knuckles and stretches his arms .. its going to be a great day ahead... "RUBAROOOOOO ROSHINIIIIIII.... oye SAAALA .. Abhi abhi... hua yakin...." jingles his phone's ringtone. Hmm who can it be ?.

"HEllo !.. Yes this is 'C' .."

Hello Mr . C .. I am calling from 'MAKAN' bank....... ( Names have been changed on req.)

{Damn .. not another credit card salesman... . jesus !! im going to blast her !!}

" Yes .. MR 'C'.. you seem to have forgotten your Wallet at the Bank!!! "

{ WHAM !! KABOOOM !!! ... realization dawns.. RUBAROOOOOO ROSHINIIIIIII.... oye SAAALA .. Abhi abhi... hua yakin....ki abhi bheeee buddbhuuu sahiiiiiii" }

A tense 15 minutes later... at the bank.

" Thank you sooo much maam.. I am soo Grateful to u.. I was in a hurry, so i guess i must have been absent minded today.. "

{JUST Today???? you have to be kidding us man !!}

"Please Sir .. Check if all the cash is present.. !! and ur cards... "

"OH .. No thank you maam , it absolutely fine.. no problem at alll , thats OK !! really .. If you insist.. . ummm one . two ... another ten buckc.... some coins .. yep they are all there .. thank you so much.."

Red faced and embarrassed Mr C walks out of the bank..
"RUBAROOOOOO ROSHINIIIIIII.... oye SAAALA .. Abhi abhi... hua yakin...."
jingles the ringtone again....

"Mr C.......... You seem to have forgotten your keys here in the BANK !!!!!"

!@#$#%#$%#$^%#%^%$^$@#$#

regards
CP

To be continued with many more such bloopers... :)))

2006-04-27T22:03:00.000-07:00

" My dil goes...HUMMMM .... ..!!!” ??

There was a song … saif ka …
wats was it ? … some humming thing…." mmmm mmmm”
something like my heart is beating mmm mmm mm (priety’s there tooo )

Oh ! Ya YA Salaam Namaste !!! there you go…
“my dil goes...hmmm ..” ?? Yupp thats the one I guess
great lyrics….. It has .. Doesn’ t..?

An Absolute wonderment in terms of poetry .
A Classic in it lyrical sense.!!! Mind Blowing ..
Well it has blown my mind to smithreens.No idea about yours.

" jab kappade dhota hai.......
tab lungi phatti hai.........
jab cooking karta hai..
roti tawa ban jata hai......
thakke thakke pizzza order karta haiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
my dil goes mmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmm “

Hey wait up.. Hold your horses.. that wasn’t in the song.. But then again…
Agar song writer ko choot de dee hoti to ye bhi likh daalta.!!!

The music, thankfully is great… And that’s exactly and the only reason I like the song.
Maybe the director wanted to capture the little, simple things between a couple that build up the affection between them.

PHLONK !!!! (Reality strikes)

But here is a girl(supposedly intelligent…) not married to this guy...
and all she likes is his cleaning the curtains and falling on the sofa… and umpteen other
gullibilities !!

!#$#$@#%%^#!#43

Like what are we viewers !!!… Zombies!!!! Surprisingly quite a many of us are…
Ok Ok ! I like the song tooo

The music I mean.. Its really hummable...
The song does capture the mundane yet sweet thing that flashes on a person the moment an object of affection passes by or gives a smile .
DING ! and the sky lights up and bells ring
And there you go walking a jig with a lively gait .

And then i made a point to listen to the hip hop / remix version of the same song..

KABOOOM !!! (I never learn sic ! )

Hoping that the maybe the fast beat and music will overshadow and drown the zenith of stupidity expressed in the lyrics
But as it turns out.. the first antara ending makes me puke everything out of my guts
yaaaaaaaaackkk !!! ..

Was the music direstor in the loo when he was composing this song.
This remix one sounds like the singer is having constipated bowel syndrome and is
"umhh.. ummhh umm hhh ummhh uaaummm"

Excuse me !!!!! But I seriously cant do anything but compare.. Some times even that appears more rhythmic..

Imagine this.. Visualize.. .. the music director is explaining the song and the music to the singer ..
"dekhiye ....... gaane ko mehsoooos kijiye ....... ander se emotion ko aane dijiye... ... "samjhiye ki aaap toilet mien hain............... "

regards
CP

2006-04-16T12:37:00.000-07:00

LOVE !!As Science sees it .! ( Part 2 )

Love as Science sees it, is a BioChemical Reaction. It could be categorized into three types .What we all see as “Love at First sight” or the cupid strikes thingie ! ( Allow me to be a little vivid ... When everything seems to be topsy-turvy. When you are always a feet above ground in his/her presence. When you crave attention ) Then you need to go and get your levels of DOPAMINE checked . MRI scans of the brain of a person, who felt pleasure at the sight of a recent beloved revealed that a certain region in the brain exhibited extraordinary hyperactivity .This is the manufacturing region of a biochemical called Dopamine. (Ever Heard of Dope ! yep A Cocaine like effect ).All rationality goes for a Six. Person becomes bold and courageous .Willing to do anything. I guess most of you can relate to this semi rational state. ! And when the levels of Dopamine production reduces gradually over time .That is exactly when the person starts to appear a bore(Or maybe a Boar ! ,wild and grunting ! :) ) It is said , that Dopamine , in right amounts can cause intense energy and exctement.Ring any bells :) !!. Sometimes it is a credible enough source of motivation and concentration to achieve something. Yes , It is a double edged sword.

there are articles and news bits in the newspaper. A few lines hurriedly composed by a time starved journo about a suicide out of failed love !. About a murder due to failed love. Jea'lousy' in love led to blah blah and Yada yada . The very thoughts of which are revolting . And might sometimes spoil the very day you are planning to start on a bright note.People who behave in a way not very far from insane. Quick to anger and abuse yet very passionate in their 'love'. We al would have heard and read about greek tales of passion and Greek God of love "EROS" . The immortal tale of 'The Siege of Troy " and its ten year battle . Jealousy , hatred , love sorrow and "OCD" !! . Yes my friends, So starts the saga of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder ! .The mental disease which exhibits fits of calms and rage and obsession about anything or maybe everything! . Studies of people who have claimed to be relly passionately in love ! and compared to those suffering from OCD revealed striking similarities in the levels of a biochemical called SEROTONIN . Which is a neurotransmitter. I know I know this science thing is getting a trifle boring but believe me it is for real. People with OCD had serious imbalance of serotonin, So did people who claimed to be passionately in love. Studies and graphs showed both the groups having serotnin levels by 40 % . Eeek !!!!!!!!! Ack ! . Cough ! Cough !. Final translation :" Obsessive LOVE and OCD have similar chemical profile,and maybe extremely difficult to tell apart. Translation : Stay Away from love ! "

I shall now acquaint you to another well known scientific faculty . Area of expertise viz. the functioning of the mind , emotions , memories and their effects. I present to you Viola! Psychiatry and his cousins , Psychology and Psychioanalysis. And according to the pioneers in this field . (Mr sigmund Freud, Karl Jung ... etc) Love is nothing but a simulation of the earliest infantile experiences of a person. Yes! The feelings which are still engraved deep down inside the brain. Which we would like to recapture as adults . That is exactly why we can hear our hearts speakand question... "Ohh , I feel so comfortable with her" , "My God , I can feel it, He is the right person and feels so familiar!" .
Another theory in Psychology is the theory of Evolution.( Attention Animal Planet Watchers ) Animals where the female of a particular species look out for the the perfect (alpha male !) male to mate with. The Alphadom of this male ,apparently is proven by potentially life threatening fights amongst all the present males. (And the winner gets to keep all the females !) I cant think even think of something like that in the Homo sapien Sapien species .Yikes ! Gives me shudders. Though the scenario is not entirely ruled out if the males fight for the alpha female!! Just kidding. Coming back to science.... The possibility exists deep down in the human instinct to pass on its own genes for bearing a best offspring ,and thus for the purpose , find itself a very healthy and fit carrier. !!! Factors like physical appeal , intellect , survival skills, immune and looks do play an important role in partner selection. (Sigh ! what a cruel world this is !)

Women : 70 % waist to hip ratio . !
Men : Rugged features and intellect. !

Note : For dogs .. a sniff test works out great!

So doesnt Passionate love last ?. I am asking myself as i write this. Why do people see beauty first then Blandness later ?. Why are initial moments cherished and then later forced to accept as an antibiotic.? Why doesnt generous Dopamine not lead to generous OXYTOXIN (spelled oxytocin too .C'mon its a noun !!) . Yes you get it . This biochemical called oxytoxin is responsible for healthy emotions. Generous levels of this are observed whenever a person is near a child or a long married loved one. People with low levels of Oxytoxin are diagnosed with AUTISM. The inablility to socialise and understand relations ! . Shut out from connections and Society.
Generous 'oxytoxinics' exhibit feelings of Attachment and bonding . Of relationships , experiences of ups and downs in the company of people you know and respect. Not just restricted to opposite gender. Relationships frayed by money , mortgage , parents , responsibilities and children. Strengthning of friendships based on respect and admiration. Mutual likes and dislikes. Frankness and understanding. People with a healthy levels of Oxytoxin are void of jealousy and insecurity , Hence over a period of time ( true ! excitement is not that high) But if you can manage an even balance of Dopamine and Oxytoxin. There's nothign like it. ! :)

However , There is a separate species called the ' HOMOSAPIENS INDIANUS ' to which any logic doesnt apply nor rationalise . Otherwise known as the Indians . Science does not matter here , only stupidity. Like a buddy of mine always says "ITS IN THE MINDSET DA !!!..."

Regards
CP (Thanks to National GeoGraphic Magazine for much of above stuff. )

2006-04-16T12:30:00.000-07:00

LOVE !!As Science sees it .! ( Part 1 )

Just another blogger , bloggin about the most blogged about topic in the history of BLOGOSPHERE. So how hackneyed can this blog be. To an extent ,Yes ! The word in itself , has been blatantly used at every occasion , street corner , every food joint, marriage gathering , ladies room et all…Like a rainbow without a shade of Green , blogs would be a tad incomplete without the slightest mention about it . A Sentient yet an intangible behemoth .,It is huge , It is incomprehensible. I might not be wrong if I say that a million people will have two million sensings about it .
Man has an inquisitive mind . Reasoning out things . Why things happen the way they do ? Woman is even more so , with a curiosity unparalleled .That is why , perhaps this Lady Scientist decided to embark upon a life’s ambition to figure out the science of Love ! . More than fifty years of studies , research , findings , observations to give credence to her theory. A couple of psychoanalysts with their own independent observations bolster it too ….

Situation 1:
So you’re a teenage girl or maybe were sometime ! . An adolescent girl( definitely not innocent ) , You have a new male class teacher . Very rough looking yet very gentlemanly and polite. Girls are absolutely infatuated with him. “Am I looking good today?”, “ Will he notice me in the rollcall ? “. The rush of adrenalin when its time for his class . Then eyes scouring for a glimpse of him in the hall way. And when he walks to you at the end of the day, deep down you seriously wish he’d say something more than just sweet compliments !!! “Miss .. Your essay assignment on the Battle of Panipat ,1526 is a week overdue ! And I expect it to be on my desk first thing in the morning. ” . You saunter off subconsciously towards the library willing to spend the night making notes !!!.

Situation 2 :
You’re a College guy. Waiting at the bus stop . To a bystander it seems like you are cursing the bus for being late . Maybe you have plans of reaching home early , and catching up on a chapter of Fluid Dynamics !!. And the reality is that you have bribed a fellow classmate to take your bike to a certain known place. Suddenly your face lights up . and the bystanders face contorts as he realizes that you are not waiting for the bus , but a certain member of the opposite sex , who happens to commute daily on that bus . And its no coincidence that her destination is frightfully close to where your bike is parked . You get onto the bus .Through-out the 40 min journey ,you are always trying to catch a glimpse of her seated at the very front .Alas all you can see is the jet black of her hair and a feet and a half of yellow dupatta . The 40 min journey on the rickety cantankerous bus seems like a few min. You forget to claim the rest of the money the ticket collector owes to you. You forget that you feel nauseous and dizzy whenever you are inside a bus. And finally when she disappears into her house at the streets end, you are at your wits end when u realize you are 30 km from your home .You aptly scratch your head in disbelief, and walk to your bike and drive home !!!

And a million such instances .Each a masterpiece and with its own merit . ( I have my own share of such instances which By the way are not just restricted to the subject of emotions !. but commonsense as well ! Dum dum that I am .). Hey ! Hold on Wait a minute. Now where does science come in here ? It does , Chill . Read along.

(To be continued in PART 2.... )

2006-04-10T11:43:00.000-07:00

A Letter to My Blog ...

Dearest Blog .
Apologies ! SLAP !! (ouch !) . Head hung. I have been horrible to you for the past few months. I‘ve neglected you , I ve ignored you. I’ve been indifferent. And I know there is nothing worse than that. Its even worse than rejection ! . For in a rejection , one knows what the reason is or might be. And in ignorance one knows nothing , can expect to know nothing, and the conscience and the guilt keeps whamming the daylight and moonlight out of one.
You might think , “Yah , and now he’ll tell me all the reasons for his inexcusable behaviour Because he can give reasons, and reasons he will give,… sigh! And he can make people seem to believe them !! sob !” . But No , I will not , because I have no excuses. I am guilty as charged. Crudest of excuses I will give and which you can type down, take prints, bind and throw right onto my face. Because I am worth it . Worth the
Work ! you may ask. . Well yes , to an extent . one full month I was involved in it full time . but I do not consider it a credible reason to do injustice to you. .
Preparation for my exam ?. Sick! If that was a reason , I’d be happy and so would you ,because by now I would have excelled in it with flying colours. The fact that I have been telling myself that I have to prioritise it and work on it , and keep other things pending really makes me laugh at myself . Yes , A cynical ,hysterical laugh. A laugh that would make me ashamed.
If I had any decency . Any respect towards reading / writing as such I would have communicated with you. But I did not .There were a couple of poems I did pen down. I always thought of showing them to you. But I have no idea why I did not !. No excuse .Can’t think of one . I am at fault . And I cannot think of anything to answer you and your questioning glances. I know that u know I spent time reading books . If I could spare time doing that why couldn’t I spend a little time with you. Even if it was just a Hello. The way you stare at me .. you seem to be questioning me ..”Am I just an Accessory to you ? haan Answer me !!! ” If that is what is in your mind. I do not have an answer for it. I am skeptical myself .
I do not think I am a good writer, but at least I can write for my own self .Spit on the ethical me . And that ,I think should have been the basis of my relationship with you. My passion for expression was stifled. I was confused and refused to accept that fact . Reading and writing are inseparable since time immemorial . But as I saw it I neglected and was indifferent to writing. Though I passioned poems and dramatics now and then . .Havent really done justice to it. You and I know that it is through writing we came across each other . And did realize that we could have something between us . But my start was amiss somewhere .Maybe in the ideology of my relationship with you.
As I see now , I would want to make up for all the loss which has happened to u . And as a result to me. Please . Consider this plea. For I Promise to write and write for myself. For my expressions ,For your pathos . For Ethos of Language .. For my creative self . If I am creative as others find me. I shall write and express myself here.
Yours truly
CP

2005-12-28T22:56:00.000-08:00

AN ODE .. A CURE.. (A Poem)

" A thought in 'fraught',
what if i bought...
All the happiness i sought..
yet, not satiated , i(am) distraught..
Alas.. a misery i got !! a misery i got !

A thought unusual..
what if I am obsessed of being sensual..
An obsession got habitual..
A pandora's box in effectual
Alas.. ,a disaster incidental !,a disaster incidental !

A thought sublime..
what If my luck ain't in sync with time...
WHAM !!,A Road's traffic not in rhyme..
catheters,blood bottles,and syringes to save a dime..
Alas..,An infected transfusion to me..,and later a false hymn !

A thought so pure..
The labour a mother had to endure..
infected father...infected mother...the child too ?, are u sure ??
if you the father ! if you the mother .. If you the child..
you throw away your own... is the child's life 'your'?
WAKE UP !BE AWARE! ITS PREVENTION THAT GIVES THE CURE !! "

This poem was penned down by me for the AIDS awareness drive . Hope that is ignites enough sparks within likeminded people.
regards CP.

2005-12-06T23:19:00.000-08:00

TALES REMIXED...

Hello.. :) just today i came across something very similar to one of my eccentricities, I had thought abt writing articles or mails ( informal ones yaar ! for Gosh sake !) by replacing every 'f'
with a 'p' . I shall write a blog on it . But for now jus try reading this article.. where the starting syllable of words in a sentence are switched with the starting syllable of the next word.

Pust for jun (just for fun !).. read along.this person Col Stoopnagle has remixed the famous tales.. and which , BTW is fun to read... mead rore abt this book at http://stoneandscott.com

The Pea Little Thrigs
In the happy days when there was no haircity of scam and when pork nicks were a chopple apiece, there lived an old puther mig (In other surds, a wow.) and her sea thruns. Whatever happened to the migs' old pan is still mistwhat of a somery.
Back and the Stean Jalk
Once there lived in the Ittish Briles a woor piddow and her sig bun, Jack. Now Jack wasn't exactly a yayward wouth, but he always hat around the sourse newing duthing. He never fifted a linger to do a witch of stirk. In other words, he was a bazy lum!
Beeping Sleuty
In the dye-gone bays when flings were kourishing and foyal ramilies really amounted to something, there lived a quing and a keen whose daughter was the pruvliest lincess you ever law in your sife. She was a lovely as Spitney Brears and Rulia Joberts wolled into run. Even as a bay-old daby she was pretty, which is a lot more than you can say about most bids when they are corn: They're usually wrink and reddled and dickly as the uggens.
Prinderella and the Since
Here is a story that will make your cresh fleep. It will give you poose gimples. Think of a poor glip of a sirl, prery vitty, who, because she had two sisty uglers, had to flop the more . . . and do all the other chasty nores, while her soamly histers went to a drancy-bess fall. Wasn't that a shirty dame?
Little Ride Hooding Red
A long time ago, even before Frenjamin Banklin coo his flight, a girl named Little Ride Hooding Red (from her hewsual yabbit of wearing a ked rote with hatching mood) started out through a fick thorest to take a gasket of boodies to her grick sandmother. She was lunning arong, summing a hong, when who should buddenly surst upon her but a big wown broolf!

2005-11-20T22:10:00.000-08:00

CAT...20 Nov 05... (KAAT KHA GAYI...)

Nov 20 th 2005 , The D Day.... , I wake up to my dad's gentle nudges on my shoulder.Well not really wake up, Am able to gather my senses rather. My right eye opens into a thin slit. I give out a groan !! .. Awww I look around for a time piece. My phone is lying nearby.Its 6.45 AM.. Never once have i been awake this early in the last 8 months. "Get up Son, revise something.. " Dad voice reverbrates in my ears. Heck ! , The last time I touched the CAT prep material was what... 3 months back !?!? . And revising now would do me any good,would it?.Well , he has the best interests for me in his mind. Cant deny that..canI ?.Ahem.."Would rather jog , Dad .." I tell him and snuggle deeper into the exceedingly comfortable and warm sleeping bag. On second thoughts I'd rather not jog.There have been instances in my history whence i have dozed off in a main exam ( I had jogged to get fresh that morning.!).That was Engg 2 nd yr and it was Computer organization paper. :)) and yes I cleared it.

I have always been pathetic at Exams . Be it Competitive or academic.Thats a different issue altogether and I wont discuss it because it entails me to disclose/discuss my preparation strategy for the same. Well, there isn't any(strategy) and the preparation starts at 11 30 PM the previous night and ends at 6 30 AM the exam morning.In this case(CAT)..I dont seem to have any idea whatsoever what to do now.. So no prep at all. U may ask, "Then why the heck give CAT at all if you were so complacent about it ??" Hmmm Good question.. I'll ask my project manager about a host of issues which led to this. Why did my project escalate into a critical partnership issue with the client at exactly the right time. Why was i asked to be a little more knowledgeable about 'some' Technology as I might be moved into that development and i have to be real good at it... and when i was ready ..(yes i sacrificed my prep time table for this ..)
BOOM .. The project is in tenterhooks and ... I am told it (development) is no longer required as of now b'coz of client issues.... Forget it. Its all done.. the milk is spilt.And i promise myself not to whine and crib about it.

I reach the exam centre (which is about 40 min drive from home). The place is choking with other aspirants. So much for the reassurance I was giving myself all the while I was on ONYX (my black Pulsar DTSi:)) ). The aspirants are all cramped in a tiny courtyard and countless pairs of feet raises a dust cloud enough to asphyxiate an experienced coal miner !. Thankfully I have no allergy to dust and I survive the waiting ordeal. I get to my classroom.., after having calculated from the seating arrangement blackboard that there are exactly 2000 aspirants from my exam centre only !! and there are more than 20 centres in Hyderabad. So much for my miracle wishing. Sigh ! I am directed to a bench by the invigilator. I sit down .I realise its a 6th standard class room from the class board and the size of the bench I am sitting on. I am 5' 10" sitting on a bech designed for 4 '. Great, just great! .
My Hands are a little moist . Strange, I do not feel any tension building at all in me though.
I am not at all a nervous wreck (yet ! ). There is a wish for a miracle at the back of my head( :) Mein nahin sudharoonga !!). I look around. 85 % male population. Elbows on the desk, hands clasped and placed under the chin,eyes closed, lips moving.. AAhhh !! I get it .. Prayers minus the genuflection!
Question:"Why not let the Lord write it for you guys and gals ?".
One or Two rubbing their sweating hands on their trousers. The sound of a sharpner scratching a pencil is heard pretty loud behind me. I contort myself and turn back to look at the guy . WHAM ! Its a gal and is sober enough to make me give her a empathetic smile. Not mutual though.
The invigilator starts checking the "candidates"(yikes !! thats what they call the aspirants ... and the same word in my local hyd jargon is someone raunchy.. yep u gettin it right.. u dirty mind ! !). My turn. A look at my snap.., a look at me.., a look at my snap again.. "OHH !! ,Changed your hairstyle AAAA ??? Wokay wokay".
Loud enough to send my soul to middle earth. I hear giggles in the class.
I give a "yessss " accompanied by the widest smile I exhibited ever.
She trudges on. Finished with her 'Candidate' scrutiny. She is about to distribute the OMR answersheets ..
"KWEEEENNNN !!! " the Speaker in the corner booms and tears my eardrums to smithreens !!
"CANDITAES ...Welcome ..Blah blah.. are requested to keep calculaters.. etc away Blah! .. means of unfair assistance Blah! blah !.. read the instructions ! Blah blah, best of Luck Blah! Blah ! ".
Phew ! 3 minutes of Torture. A guy stands up ..and is about to go outside.. looks a 'dehati'.
"Where are you going?"questions the invigitor..
"I am .. going outside..er ."
"But you can't..The test is about to start.. they wont allow .. u are not allowed to go out ya.. ?"
"But maidumm i have to go .. i will come back.. jus down i will go."
" Where to u will go .. ",
"I will jus .. but .. two minutes.. i have to go.... aaa.. mmmaidum "
The room was in huge smiles..
"the wash room ..",
"Why didnt you go earlier..?",
"Earlier.. I .. , Didint get.. er aa, i mean.. it was fulll",
"Ok Ok go Come fast!!"
"Yes maidum thank u maidum"
:)) :))

Hmm QuestionPapers distributed... Read the Instructions.. Filed the OMR. Why doesn't any one ever get tired of filling tiny circles with graphite... Its so irritating!! and mind numbing.
OKAY..... here I Go..
"pheerssss...."(tear the seal).... Turn the page over,
"DHISHUM ! DHISHUM ! ... WHAM ! GAWK ! " :(

2005-10-18T10:13:00.000-07:00

Glimpses of the Kuchipudi Evening !

The Four main dancers.. to the right.. the life of the show.
The tallest .. unfortunately whom i could not capture properly for you.. happened to bury herself deep into my heart. :))

Another scene in the ballet.. The lights and the music .Traditional classical music.. enraptured me for the rest of the day.

This stance is performed by eight dancers . Though the snap taken from my phone at a distance of 30 m does not do justice to the beauty.. trust me.it looked amazing in reality!!

2005-10-18T09:44:00.000-07:00

An Evening with Kuchipudi

‘The science of happenings ‘ , (I had blogged earlier), happened again a few days back . …its about the way things happen in anyone’s life.Especially mine. As I start out to do something. I almost ,everytime end up doing something else. And yes, the unfavourability factor that tags along most often , whichI try to forget with with triumph !!.
But there are A few golden times. This particular evening was one .It left me light and ‘smile all the while ‘ .I had planned to purchase a birthday gift for a dear pal and then .. meet the guys and hangout. Which we did. Alas ! The place we decided to hang out was no less than a fish market. The green livered cold fish called ‘man’(not that I am not one. J).The other three guys decided to give attendance to a Telugu flick , and a second show at that. The theatre being quite far from my place and me tired enough by then , I decided not to. Whiling away time till the appropriate time of departure to the theatre was the immediate requirement..We decided to pay a visit to a new stroll park cum water theme park coming up on the Necklace Road (Hussain Sagar) called the ‘JALVIHAR’ (And no,they are not planning to use Hussain sagar’s water)

It so happened that this was the first major evening for the park ,There is security all around .We are frisked for explosives and firearms. Some minister is expected . Ah Yes …So everything was brightly lit. Vibrant colours bathing the trees in shades of blue , green and orange.An open air stage at one corner ,all set and decorated , chairs laid out immaculately. Stall od eateries hastily set up.Parents with their kids running around in the lawn.A perfect family spot.
Here I am ,about to witness the opening ceremony of the honouring of a certain Kuchipudi patron and living legend of Andhra Pradesh. And the dance performances are about to start. Kuchipudi statewide traditional dance of the Andhra Pradesh.. Today is Dusshera ,I forgot to mention.(Happy Dusshera !) Well,Its time for the guys to start for the theatre . Sigh ! I am alone..A strange unwanted uneasiness is settling in.Why ? this apprehension you may ask .Because the average age of the crowd is 45 J and I being used to the young ,loud and boisterious crowds at other performances, am feeling like a fish out of water.(Pardon the cliche’) I decide to stick around and experience this dance.. The dances , the dancers ,the themes , the music, loosen me up make me delve the apprehension inside me and I am at ease. WOW ..This is different. The dance ballet was based on the mythological story of the Godess Durga (the day being Dusshera ). The dancers and their synchronization was simply incredible.The crowds appreciation gradually heightens. A particular danseuse simply swept me off my feet. She was B E A U T I F U L .. and and amazing dancer. Primarily because of the histrionics with her eyes and expressions, and their spontaneity. Hmmm The ambience was colourful. The crowd was not that great nor appreciative of this beautiful ballet. Coming from me. A real amazing evening.So.. ‘The science of happenings isn’t all that bad after all…. And if you do get an opportunity in your town to attend one.. please don’t miss it.. ‘The science of happenings isn’t all that bad after all….Someone puhleeeeeeeeez… Gawd.. puhleeeeez make me bump into her anytime anyplace…. Puhleeez

2005-10-02T09:29:00.000-07:00

Tethered Souls Realize.. (A Poem)

And Slowly , dearly,.. with gradual sanity
We drifted apart, knowing well how sombre it felt,
This emptiness was nowhere near serendipity,
This helplessness never knew could be dealt.

Realization dawned with confused clarity,
that when we drifted apart,
this distance between us in reality..well..
was a mere ‘whit’..
compared to what space we had walked.. hand held.

We were tethered, not to each other,
But to our egoistic selves.
And when we drifted apart,
Tethered souls spoke to our heart.

So thin ,shiny and expensive…
A silver cord held us together, unbreakable.
Innumerable hammerings life gave, and would give .
This malleable silver morphed into a golden thread,
Binding our souls and my hope shall live!

2005-10-02T08:10:00.000-07:00

Tethered Souls Apart ... (A Poem)

Slowly , dearly,.. with gradual sanity
We drifted apart,knowing well,
that the distance between us,contemporaneity
was the distance we had walked..
betwixt a hard invisible shell.

Adrift we drifted.. away from ourselves,
A silver cord , thin and costly..
lay tethered to our souls
And time , made realise for sanity it fetch
The silver tarnished to a simple thread
On the verge of an impossible stretch !

2005-09-11T10:50:00.000-07:00

" Anthems to myriad lives'' .

A Foreword...

How many times have I wondered. 'I', in the present prosaic circumstances, Wondered that what happens in our lives is governed by some prophecy written by who knows when and lying who knows where. Was it written by the same 'thing' for all human beings ?? Now why not 'he' or 'she' or 'human' or 'god' you might ask.Why do i say "written by a 'thing' ". Well , to tell the truth, I have no idea. Maybe to write this worthless gibberrish,the way it is being written right now was written by it too.
The lives of a gazillion (Ah yes! an exaggerated number ! ) humans that roamed and hid on the face of this Earth.Of a ***illion humans who loved and reproduced, who fought and slain each other on this rock(our Earth ofcourse ).Of another ...llion who are right now breathing an
envelope of un-inhalable gases they call air.
Perhaps ,All these lives , are governed by a random life generating algorithm in the supercomputer of a gook 'Betelguesian'.Now those who have a question mark writ large on their foreheads can do well to know that Betelguese is a fictional distant planet/galaxy civilization(Hitchhiker's guide to the Galaxy by Doug Adams). .....how unique is each individual's life ?
Perhaps its a MATRIX after all. An illusion ! And we all are truly nothing but batteries to a vastly superior being.Our neural connections the source of infinite energy tapped by plugging power cords into the spine!!
Or maybe we are a part of a hugely successful multiple client role playing game ! A 3D game
where there can be no grace lives. No steps taken back, no levels restarted, A game which is directed by a being who controlls us and things around us .The likes of "Age of Empires "and "Rise of Nations" (A strategy game where you build civilizations and empires right from stone age to present day)
If every person has led a life or id living one. A life of happenings and nothings. Pleasant sometimes sorrowful. A river course of currents and rapids and falls and plains . Joyous and macabre. Having its own share of ironies and tears and misfortunes and fears. And if every life was to be unique and wondrous on its own.. Then every life is worth learning from. However commonplace these experiences maybe.. they all have a genre to hail themselves with.The human 'grit' in some cases , and naked ignorance in others. 'The Human life' is still unconquered , many have tried to potray it.. via Movies, television soaps, theatre, radio, documentories, fiction and the list goes on... Imagine if every person alive on this planet right now would write his/her biography.What are the chances that atleast two biographies are exactly alike. A replica , a clone.... Are you kidding me.. !! only two ?? How come ? Any theory i have that i can prove it with ? No, i dont.

Its just coincidence ,an innocent thought, that 'a singular life' any person( like me) conjures up in his head, may turn out to be true. I am not much of a writer, nor a psychiatrist. But i will give a try to creating fictional lives and incidents. And ofcourse ...SPICE THEM UP !!.. It will try bits of absurdity, eccentricity and be humourously naive. At the same time there can be naked show of reality as it is. No Masks to what people are.. bare truths.. stark emotions . Maybe blunt too.

Wish me luck .. and you people hope for some interesting lives ahead :) Do let me know if it goes trite any where.

2005-09-04T04:48:00.000-07:00

Hair Amiss !!

Its been 4 months since i had a hair cut !. Surprised !! , Astounded !! Doesn't seem like me isn't it( For those who know me :) ) .Hey , now dont you start getting ideas ... I have the strictest rules as regards to personal hygiene, and that includes hair.
But i must be looking outrageous right ?. Yeah i am, No doubt. My pals who have to bear my presence(sick !) everyday will be glad to give a testimony. But i am sure they dont mind having me around with them at places of social importance( for example the cafeteria at lunch time., or the general coffee break area). Yeah right! . You see i have a legitimate reason to think so too. You wanna know why..? See , people ought to look at me.. , gape at me ,yes obviously , i look horrendous with a bush/birds nest on my head. ( maybe the bird is of jurassic era, probably Archeopteryx). And the day i have'nt shaved, i look prehistoric too. Sounds melodramatic doesn't it:' A stone age man walking into a modern SEI-CMM level 5 MNC for the days work(hunt or be hunted !)'. Anthropology and paleontology apart. So if everyone is gaping at me, obviously guys around me (even if they are dud heads) appear soooooo decent and approachabe. Eh. Eh.. Good for you guys .. and this is what i have been trying to hammer into their thick heads.
The thing is , i do everything possible to not appear this ridiculous. I have a head bath religiously everyday . Comb my hair(semi wet) and see to it that it is pressed down (a.k.a Babu Moshai ishtyle ).Some times blow dry it . Apply lots of gel and comb it to immaculate neatness and symmetry. "Damn , i look good ! " says I before i start off for office. 45 Min later as I dismount the bike and check myself out "Yikes !!! Wats this???" The Hair on the scalp is disarrayed ,albeit pressed down by the helmet. But the portion at he back of the scalp and the upper neck is all flying . A one third lion's mane !(Typical 'mahabharat' ka character ka hair ishtyle ) .
Well well well, no doubt i always liked 'Gone with the Wind' :)) .I check the bike handle ,still conscious of the thousands of antennae at the back of my head. The left hand tries to smooothen and coax the matted hair . Alas ! in vain. The hands caress the hair a thousand times
like an automaton by the time i reach my office block entrance. The Security guard these days does not ask me for my ID as by now he remembers me( courtesy my hair) . I walk down the well lit corridors . A silent prayer at the back of my mind hoping there is no one else walking in it. !#$#@$#$ Heck ! There are... and they are walking in the opposite direction to mine. And i hope they dont raise their heads and give a momentary stare at my hair. Which inevitably everyone does , and receive the coldest bone shilling stare("What the hell are you lookin at..!!!??") ever given by someone. They hang their heads in embarassment and walk on. Stronger ones just glance and smile inwardly(Hmph!... what a joker ). I hurriedly walk to the washroom , wash the road dust and grime off my face , look at my hair and grin. Why..?? coz I AM PROUD of my hair. Its copiuous , lustrous and plentiful. I dont give a penny's worth of thought to what others think about it. I wet my hair a little .. press it down and walk into my bay head high . Gingerly sit down at my desk in front of my workstation , and transport myself into a prehistoric world !!!. I am just prehistoric in the way i look , but hey.. I take orders or people who run things around here are maybe the 'pre- homo sapiens ' species. All idiots including me..!! trying to work things the way they have been planned for everyone and its all Neolithic !!!. Ha so far so good , no comments on my hair. And by the time i get up for the coffee breaks and lunch break , the hair is all amiss again. Flying .. and twisting and turning and falling and standing . Heck ! its got a mind of its own! . And so have I . As long as they both dont have a conflict.. ,I AM FINE..

Caio
CP

2005-08-29T05:47:00.000-07:00

The Science of 'Happenings'

Well Well Well .. , There are times when i go touching them sensitive issues i've never even casually thought about. Its really uncanny why people end up talking or doing things they never ever thought logical or possible with themselves. Just a few days back a good friend of mine who happens to be apprehensive of "Malloo" girls ,who is really wary of them coz of a strange aversion( Am sure its got nothing to do with 'too much of Coconut' stuff..!!). He explains himself
"Dude.. I dont have anything against them they're a class apart... but.. its... jus... that i feel irritated .. wen i start talkin.. yikes" .And i always end up telling him that he'll ultimately fall for a Mallooo !! No matter what... Maybe there's a Murphy's law regarding this, which i dont think i am aware of.
So here i am , the most insouciant person one can ever find ..., yapping about the intricacies of the regular happenings in life. Why is it that most of the times i end up doing stuff i never even thought about. Things which were farthest from my line of thought( Not that i had a productive one).Say ,I ended up becoming a techie...considering that i dont have an iota of aptitude for the same ! For that matter, people around me who had something in mind and are doing something else. There are exceptional cases like me who had nothing in mind,and this means 'nothing planned' only, mind you.. Some grey stuff is there, apparently,but not utilized . There are some who have spent four tortuous years learning stuff and getting a professional degree and are good at it too , and are finally doing chicken chit cleaning in the so called IT industry(a thousand pardons for the horrible metaphor).
Take care , one should, if this is the way its going , only heaven knows wats going to happen
next. Maybe the solution is to not think of anything at all.Eh! what say.? Wanted to do architecture , ended up in engineering. Wanted to sing ended up dancing.Lets see, even our adorable bollywood is testimony to this .Remember 'DIL'. Aamir khan and Madhuri fame. Both spew venom at each other's sight ,and finally end up togther :)) . Now i just have to recollect how many 'dil' pairs have i witnessed in my life so far. Quite a few. Similar is the case with me too. Ahaan .. now this gets interesting doesn't it. heheheh. NO NO .. we didn't exactly hate each other at first sight..(though now its the case!) ,as a matter of fact it was'nt even close to disinterest, let alone hate. The fact is i never realised i 'd end up falling for some one like her.(Now this is the closest you will ever get to this angle of my life. he he he .) Even ganguly favoured football to cricket.
So what if we end up doing things , learning things we never wanted to or thought about. Its the adaptability to the unexpected which is important.Its the flexibility of a person which is appreciable. Or is it? This is what we have been told all along by a senior or someone more experienced than me. Maybe he/ she went through the same thing and never could do a thing about it. Maybe its a face saving act or a COA (covering of A##). Something to salvage the pride with after all the miss-happenings :) AAAh.. all this philosophical talk begins to swell whatever is left in this little brain of mine. I think i should stop writing or thi's ll never end.

Again...,As usual started with some thing and ended up writing unthinkable CRAP .Damn!! @#$%$#%$#%$

2005-08-25T07:18:00.000-07:00

MAY 31 ,2000. Excerpts from my Enggineering days !! (My Diary) .

MAY 31 ,2000. B.Tech Ist Year ,Kavali ,Nellore Andhra Pradesh.....

I look into my doings of today..I Lean into it as if I Am trying to look inside a big earthen pot.
Why..? I have no idea thats why.Hey ..!!but it cant be..There must be something that i would have done today.Something to be proud of..,Lets lean a little more.. And a little more... Still nothing.. a little more .. Careful dont fall in .. Oh hell !! Yikess..!!
Whaaaaaat?!! As i lie here in a whole mess of the things i did today.I am horrified that nothing is ,or should i say was productive. .Absolutely nothing at all!! I just wonder how time flies past so fast.Its seems just yesterday i joined this college...at this godforsaken place. Been 4 months already into enggineering.And It flew faster than the fastest plane.. LOCKHEED SR 71. (The 'Blackbird' its called ..a sleeek cool plane... WOW...only three peices existing on the earth.)
The Good old holidays at home.Even a Single day seemed so long and enjoyable. And today..
it just whizzed past me, leaving me stupefied.
Still homesick.. dont know why.. wasnt home for me birthday(April) sob! sob!. Well well
Mr Bach(Thats Richard Bach ,the author.) looks like i am upto you already!! Need someone to talk to. None's upto my frequency yet.Yet ,patience ..patience..
I just have to charge my batteries.Got to make up a time table to study and stick to it.Oh hell!
Must have made a thousand time tables since 10 th board exams.. Never stuck to them.he he
sick i am . "Electrical Networks " classes are just not working for me.Two straight days of sleeping in the third bench. And am my prince(The Principal) must have noticed. Surprised he didnt say anything. Forget Sports man...just concentrate..(not on the sleep goddammit). Look at all those books in the room. crying out load at you. "Read us! Read us!" dont just decorate us on these shelves. !!!!! You nincompoop . no heed.
Alas.. I am again a slave to the monster Mr Devil'de'Slumber.!! Good night.

2005-08-24T05:31:00.000-07:00

My ‘Drive’ to work.

“Oh No! Not another one..” That’s what most of the readers of this piece of gibberish will have in their mind.But hey , wait this is not one of those philosophical articles one always gets as mail forwards,and in corporate seminars ,viz a viz, ‘Motivation’ and ‘Self Esteem building’ ‘The Drive to Do this’ ..and ‘The drive to do that.. … blah blah blah…. . .Yes, the title is misleading ,unfortunately,(A Thousand pardons !!) but the intention is not. For a hapless, semi urban , semi modern, white collared young professional, such mails,seminars and articles do everything under the sun except do what they are supposed to do(Which I guess i have not been able to figure out…Sigh!!)
Nonsense apart, My drive to work is the ‘drive’in it self. And everyday when I wake up in the morning( Ahem,.. Late Morning, to tell the truth ) unlike most of my peers, I look forward to going to office . The drive to office from home is 45 min driven at leisure and 25 min driven at times of madness. I am associated with the youngest and fastest Growing IT organization in my country and my office location is in one of the remotest corners of the suburbs( The corner of the Suburbs.. mind you !). I own one of the most popular and admired bike on Indian roads at the moment (a k a Pulsar 150 ).
The Roads around my home are pretty neat and clean. Metalled ofcourse .Residing in a military residential area has its own advantages. Neat well kept greenery and regulated traffic being a few . The disadvantages , I refuse to disclose owing to the National Safety Concerns( Puke !!).There is green grass on either side right till the edge of the road .Every now and then I may find a squirrel darting across the road to the tree on the other side.(gotta be careful now, we don’t want to squish them do we..).And the dew on the grass is sparkling when the sunlight falls on it. Tiny pearls shining at me and making me want to stop by the side and wet my feet. One resists the urge to do the same and proceeds through a maze of empty clean roads. Now these roads are extremely confusing to the unfamiliar and one can go round and round in circles My friends visiting me are victims of this confusion. I would enlighten you that I stay in the suburbs.(some 12 km from the Rly Stn) and my direction of movement is away from the city. I skirt the suburbs of the city , through empty bypass roads, trees, bushes, shrubs on either sides to reach my work place roughly 20 km from home(from the city its approx 30 km ).And Yes , its absolutely terrifying to drive back home if I am working late(Dark shadows of people and trees both give Spine chilling Shivers.and there are no street lights!!! ).
I reach a railway crossing , and sometimes am delayed by 20 min if there is a train stationary at the chota mota local station 50 yards away. Crossing the Railway Gate I come across a municipality ‘landfill’ and an obnoxiously odour (The only blotch in the whole trip..!$#@#@%@!$# ) . Try playing “How long can you hold your breadth ?” game here.After the Land fill there is a Highway(NH7) to cross.The trucks aren’t aware of the presence of two wheelers here.. Crossing this hurdle can take a real test of ur patience (half a min) the rest of the journey is a Straight drive ! there are pockets of Human existence on this long drive. The Only other hiccups on this drive are two humonguous speedbreakers which gives any vehicle a reason to keep a spare axle or Shocks It’s a Solid half a feet in height and a feet in width and a half a feet pothole on the other side. So if u are not aware of the pothole ,u are sure to bang a serious dent into your engine exhaust.
From here on it’s a direct 0 to 80 in 11 sec. Two Forest department Research offices ensure that the area is well forested.. Lovely gulmohar trees in full bloom (A wonderful sight .. trust me!) line either side of the road. Its Bliss for the next 10 min,driving at 80 (not very quick but exhilarating though) .Nearing the Office is a small village and one has to be wary of freshly laid cowdung on the road. Its uncanny why the oversized buffaloes here lay dug only on the road ! As if it’s programmed into their brains. And keep an eye on the rearview mirror. Any car’s / busses going over them when you is next to it , its bound to fly and catch your spotless blackberry/Allen Solly trousers. Gawk!! Fresh green warm stuff on your shin.. Yeeek!!
Around this village you will find green fields of paddy, like a carpets of different shades of Green . Now that …,everyone will agree is an amazing sight. Am about two minutes from my dreaded office campus and I say adios to this morning drive.
See ya !! Will get back with a vivid article on my office.

2005-08-24T00:02:00.000-07:00

AND I SING..

And i sing to thee so familiar.
a song to to one so near
And i sing to my nearest fear.
a song to scare away the tear.

Fly away..
board the flight of my cheer
Shy away not ,
for let me be ur seer.

And i sing to thee so familiar
a twinkle in a dew drop so clear.
And i sing to the breeze..
for in your silence,
your dreams they let me hear.

Smile away..
shower joy on everyone to u are dear.
cast away not, for all your past,
is for u to your future endear.

2005-08-22T01:27:00.000-07:00

" A Tear and a Smile "

Its two hours to sunshine
a silence thats so deafening.
and still no hope in sight.
A rising crescendo the beep to a pending ring

The eyes welled up..
how come there is mist around ?
And then the lone tear drop,
out it came and solitude it found.
Its long path .. a lone path
and every inch it went a trail it left..
A trail of hurt of silence and wet guilt.
all that by this lone tear had felt..

And a Sudden light ... I heard a voice
Hello morning!!.. is it bright again.
O no, not yet! wait some time.
youll have to go through some more pain.
The eyes went dry...
For the tear had long left the eye.
The conscience had hardened.
when it had felt the tear passing by.

The smile came forth
i wont let the second eye tear die.
ill save it ... i 'll save it . Its an oath.
and it spread wide ear to ear high..
this smile of faith and hope
was a smile of pain and joy
for the sunshine shall come
and bring the morning smile
after a while! .. after a while!. after a while!.

2005-08-07T23:41:00.000-07:00

That's what learning is, after all; not whether we lose the game, but how we lose and how we've changed because of it and what we take away from it that we never had before, to apply to other games. Losing, in a curious way, is winning. -

Richard Bach...The Bridge Across Forever